Eternal ramblings of an extremely common mind :P

Thoughts....glorious beautiful wispy realities of the mind

2011-09-29T18:59:00.000-07:00

As I sit in the office listening to a song, it triggers a portal into my past, I have read that a sound or especially a smell (the olfactory sense is one of the strongest trigger of memory) has the ability to trigger a particular memory.....as per yogic parlance there is no past for a man of wisdom......the sage is like a river.......no two times is he/she the same.......the sound triggered a particular rhythm I was familiar with......... I could feel my consciousness travel effortlessly through the past as clearly as I was living it......making me realise the potential of the brain to store memories......every thought described here refers to a particular shade of mind and I could feel it vividly......the mind had the ability to relive my past.....any past.....my habits .....any habits....my karma....any karma....making me realize the sacredness of every moment.......the holy presence of each second......described below is the flow....of consciousness.....it can make sense to the one who can induce the same trigger in his psyche as he/she goes through the passage......The girl with the small backpack…….the teacher who makes me feel special by her honeyed words……the joy of seeing my mother coming to the school gates to pick me up………her forehead glistening with beads of pearly sweat…….the day extending to comfort as she lifts me to enquire whether the other children have been horrid………the school corridors which see many an adolescent fights …….cronies huddling together to decide what should be played in the PT period…….the excitement as the hour of play approached…….the pain of being judged by exams...…Falling asleep to endure the hour long journey to my alma mater, waking up seconds before the bus reached the college….the unlit corner at the back of the canteen on Thursdays where dreams would light up the chessboard……the trip to Moonar where the heart was given away at first sight…..the cold hands of reason and prudence which taught patience to a heart…….the dreary existence in artificially lit corridors killing the soul one day at a time…..the luncheon which would never end……..the clock striking 5 which would unleash the tethered beast, my mind…….the weight of existence every morning as the bus drew nearer to the office……..the exhilaration of realizing that understanding and love of a person, given by choice outweighs petty silver………the trepidation in unveiling……….hope outweighing fear…….the disconnect…...…the understanding that it’s easy to buy sex but not love and respect……the ability to not hate even when logic dictates otherwise………the question of existence once more….ever teasing……..the faith morphing into belief…..in myself…….the joy of realizing I am the architect……good or bad , I have to love my construct…….no more fate shall be allowed to intervene………she needs my guiding hand……..the joy of unfettering the hidden embers……..the expectations surpassing the ability……….the humility which urges me to know more……..the will to play the game and best it………..first lesson: rejection………second lesson: acceptance………third lesson: detachment…….4th lesson: motivation…..with no causation……..5th lesson: Stop, reflect, change direction …..last lesson :Patience…….Months of endurance………doors open………..are they real?...........New people….new lessons……..the mind has to understand to let go……..different techniques are tried………some work , some don’t……………surrender to the greatest healer…time………remember the one who has always existed within…..no more anger……..everything melts into joy……….the golden fetter is visible again…..things which have been underneath resurface…….this time I learn……..the joy of existence visible at last………experience, my master has taught me well……..the swan song………unlocking the past…….as it glides into the present…….chiding me for not recognizing its trickery……..laying about its patterns for me to see………karma……..am I yours?............

Sahanavilla

2011-03-18T07:46:00.000-07:00

Nearly every other weekend, I flee to my sister's house to spend the time with my nieces......The timing is perfect......if I go every week they don't miss me as much when I go after a fortnight......

Initially the younger dumpling hated my guts as I used to laugh at everything she did, which she misconstrued as me making fun of her......"Not funny" she would fume with her hands on her hips.......making me double up with laughter even more......

As part of extending the olive branch I tried wooing her with chocolates, gifts , flattery but nothing worked.........
One weekend I was busy with my college assignment and did not lavish her with attention as I normally do......which piqued her....

After which I decided to let her be and started playing with her elder sister.......that did it....I was immediately called for and told that the honorable privilege of carrying her on my back had been bestowed on me...:P

She is a hard task master and was not pleased until I collapsed on the floor expressing my inability to move...:P.....but it was a start....

Under normal circumstances both of my nieces bay for their siblings blood and they consider the day incomplete until one of them has drawn blood..:P....

but sometimes the younger one understands that she is not in a position to settle the differences the way our rugged ancestors did......with her mom nearby she knows that brute force would be looked down upon.......

so she has started reverting to the beautiful art of manipulation which my sister insists has come over to the kid from her uncle....:P

She comes running to me and paints a nice little picture where her elder sister is the mean ugly bully and she is the dainty damsel in distress.....she is frail and dainty and she uses it to the maximum advantage....amid sobs...she looks at me with bamby eyes and pleads for redressal....

This puts me in a fix, though I have a soft corner for the younger munchkin......the elder one also has to be placated......luckily she understands that she is facing a formidable opponent and agrees to the terms only after committing me to a secret pact of playing PS3 with her late in the night after her nemesis has fallen asleep....

Lately they have taken to playing chess......or rather playing with chess.......I was included in the game after an afterthought....since somebody has to lose...:P
There are very strict rules which are subjective and change at a moments notice, the most intriguing one was the respectful greeting reserved for the "horse"......as in I had to ask the horse for permission before I moved it......the knight is respected for his bravery.....not so the king who is lazy and just sits around when others fight for him.....

The game of chess is put on hold to wonder whey the "rook" is shaped like a castle.....obviously somebody without much forethought had designed the game.....why not make them look like humans??
sometimes the pawns are used as missiles against poor uncle, especially when he is being a baby and wants to go have lunch.....what is lunch?, when two kingdoms are fighting for survival....

Lately my elder niece and myself have devised a strategy to play PS3 by which all the parties are kept happy....
There are two joysticks......one used by myself or the elder munchkin and the other disconnected /non functional remote is handed out to the younger daredevil with much reverence....
The elder one positions herself behind the kitchen counter...not too far away so that the infrared remote does work....and also keeps her out of the visual range of the younger one.
We have to time our shots in golf/baseball in such a way so that it coincides with the time the younger one swings her bat/club.......

If she looks behind her, the game is stalled for obvious reasons(none should interfere in the play.....its not about the team ...its more of an individual thing with her).......this takes the game to a whole new level......normal games acquire a complexity which PS3 can never emulate)

In school she is the unfettered bully, since the only person who can daunt her a.k.a her mother is not there.....her principal complained that she questions her and if she is told to share her toys with other kids...she looks incredulously at the stupid suggestion and plainly responds with a resounding "NO"......"Give it to me".....
My sister is worried about her teacher's feedback and scolds the kid for being unruly.....
But she has her uncle for support......an easy wink and secret admiration for her rebellious nature puts her right back on track :P

I have fallen in love with her world though......a world where the only competitor is her elder sister ....a jelly spined uncle as an ally.....a pack of squirts who are at her beck and call in the school.....sadly I have to return to my apartment and put up with people at work even though I would like to shout at them , say "give it to me " and be able to walk away, but thats reserved for sahanavilla alone.....

Let thy Will be done....not mine

2011-02-05T06:08:00.000-08:00

Sameer walked down the steps of the temple despondently, his mind in a whirl ......, everything was wrong with the world........his collapsing business, his creditors circling him like vultures.....there seemed to be no way out......

The path leading out of the temple ran past an ashram.......his eyes meandered through the small thatched huts which were built precariously on the edge of the river.....his eyes traced stillness .....amidst nature's rhythmic movement his eyes rested on a sadhu......great peace seemed to emanate from him....his feet of their own accord took him near the holy presence......

The sadhu was lost in himself......his beard snowy white gave his face a gentleness that made people confide their troubles in him......Sameer waited patiently.......
The timeless one gave no sign of acknowledgement.....as Sameer rose to leave....he heard a voice..."Who are you child"?.....

"My name is Sameer babaji.....I live nearby ......"
"What brings you here.....?" queried the sadhu

"I was walking back home, when I saw your ashram.....I felt this irrestible urge to come and meet the inmate of this ashram.....or maybe it was my karma which bought me here...."

"so you are a believer of karma....?" asked the sadhu smilingly....

"Of course babaji.....and I believe I have very bad karma......i am experiencing difficulties all around......what else can this be other than my own karma..."

"what do you want from me?" enquired the sadhu

"I have come to you seeking wisdom , I know that its only people like you who can conquer karma, I want to be one among you......Is it right for me to become your disciple??"

"You attribute me with powers I don't possess child......its not I who decide .....Its the almighty who is the creator of the play which we refer to as life, if its his will you will be initiated in the path"

"Babaji......If you don't help me then I would be very unhappy....you have to tell me explicitly a solution for my dilemma"

"Are you married , child?? Do you have children depending on you?"

"I have a wife, but she doesn't understand me .....her thoughts revolve around the children.....but I believe that her good karma will protect her in my absence"

"Whats her name?"

"Savitri, babaji......she is a distant relation of mine...I was forced to marry her....
Her mother died young and her father disappeared one day leaving me to fend for her"

The sadhu looked at him intently , as if trying to peer into his soul.....
"Allright child, let karma be the decider.......think of 3 things which if turned around will change your decision .....If by a week's time things are the same ......I will initiate you as my disciple"

Sameer rushed to touch the sadhu's feet....."dhanyavaad babaji......"

The sadhu lapsed into his meditations......oblivious to the surroundings......

Sameer returned home late at night, his wife and kids were already asleep......he slowly crept beside her and tried to fall asleep but could not.......though he had told the sadhu his decision , his mind was not at ease......how would his wife manage.......would she be reviled by members of his caste, his own relatives.......he felt tired asking rhetorical questions in his brain and left it to the morn to give him an answer......

The sun dawned bringing with it uneasy quibbles ......Sameer took a detour to go to his shop , on his way he encountered Mishra, his business partner rushing to meet him......
"Sammer babu.....its a miracle!!!!!!"

"What is the matter Mishraji, is everything allright?"

"It is more than allright , one of our default customer , made a bulk payment of his dues and also has roped in three more customers.....grace be to god.......now if only our creditors give us a bit more time, then we need not lose face in the community"

Sameer looked at him thoughtfully....."It is a miracle, we have been fighting with this customer since 3 years and last time we spoke he was threatening to take us to court, what could have changed his mind"

Mishraji excalimed "Sammer babu, why do you want to go into all that......the problems are over now...." he smiled....

Sameer remained lost in his thoughts........the entire day was spent in settling remaining debts, calling customers , assuring them they will get their supplies on time....

Sameer returned home to find his wife in a good mood........she had cooked his favourite meal .....the kids clung to him.......

The next day his creditors came to his house early in the morning.......
"Sammer babu......we heard that your business is picking up and you have enlarged your clientele now, we would like to apologize for being so persistent in asking for money......"

"Please don't apologize, you people have been kind enough to believe in me and invest money...."

"Thats why we have come today......you need not return the money, but we request you to give us discounts in the wholesale purchase we make from you"

"Definitely Sethji.......I am indebted to you all.....I hope I will be able to return the goodwill you have bestowed upon me..."

"Definitely Sameer babu.....We take our leave....we will sit down one day to finalize the details..."

Sameer escorted them to the street , wondering all the way back......

There was something which did not feel right......he called his wife..."Savitri....."
she came rushing out......he took her by the hand and did not stop until he reached the ashram.....

the sadhu was cleaning his asan when Sameer barged in........
"Whats the problem child, you look perturbed??"

"Did my wife come here and request you to convince me not to take to the holy path....and was it you who convinced my creditors and business partners to help me?."

"I do nothing child......as I said before, 3 things you have to choose to decide your fate...."

Sameer exclaimed...."I will believe if god himself gives me a sign.....if right now it rains , I will believe it as the signal form god that I don't need to take to the holy path and my karma lies with my family"

The sadhu stood unaffected......sameer turned to leave .....Before he could take a couple of steps......the skies overshadowed by a passing cloud and a heavy drizzle swept across the place.....

Sameer waled back slowly , took his wife by the hand and left the place speechless....

Later that night Savitri came to meet babaji.....
"Babaji , Thank you very much for understanding my plight, if only you had not convinced his business partners and the creditor's my children would have become fatherless....it was because of your powers that unseasonal rains were showered upon us..."
Let your blessings be always upon me...."

"You attribute me with powers I don't have......though I could convince people......its his will that swayed the way of nature...."

"whatever may be the case babaji......you are my saviour......bless me "

"God bless you...."

The sadhu retired to his hut.....he opened his old trunk.....a small girl of 5 years peered at him through a black and white photograph......savitri was his only child.....if only he could turn back time and undo his mistakes......He had left her to karma.....today he had to make a choice again and this time he chose wisely.....

His solitary life had taught him the power of choices over the power of destiny.....
He felt complete.....his job done....he lapsed into silence....

Eye of Garuda---III

2010-12-20T06:20:00.000-08:00

"My lord has taken so many forms.....I adore him for his versatality......but If I had to make a choice, it would be Raam, the scion of the suryavanshi clan......As with all the god-men he was misunderstood.....

As I see today his name has become the banner for politicized fights between groups, reviled by feminists for sowing the seeds of Sati into the already chauvinistic Indian society.....and for letting go of his wife when she was pregnant......

I was with him when he lived his mortal existence, though you may not see my name mentioned by the robber turned saint Valmiki , I was very much a part of the epic......for every time He descends we too follow him, not to support but to learn.....

He came to teach acceptance of the moment......surrender....surrender to the present moment....neither judging nor rejecting the present moment but take it because the moment right now is life itself......

Enlightened by his kulaguru vashishtha on the secret of life....Raam was already in a state of surrender before his life unfolded.....when his stepmother insists on his exile into the forest for 14 years, there is no inner resistance within Raam......He accepts the moment .....living it fully without much drama......the drama is created by the people around him and who deny the present.....IF Raam had a 20th century intellect he would have obsessed about his decision on days together and would have carried a grudge against his stepmother for the rest of his life....

But he accepts.....lives his life fully in the sylvan surrounding....for him it was an opportunity life had given him to explore the wild......bought up in luxury he never knew how to tame nature for ones own survival......this experience humbles him, making him a better king when he comes to ayodhya after 14 years, as he has seen life from the eyes of the lowliest member of the society......

Separation from Sita threatens nay tests his equilibrium.........it is as if the universe tests him throughout to be dramatic ...to carry a sorry picture of himself as a victimized man......He realises this when sita is taken away from him........It is the monsoon season......he sits morose in a cave contemplating the horrors his wife would be enduring.....there is nothing he can do ...the Monsoon prevents him from enabling his forces to search for sita.....he is left alone with his own mind.....the inability forces him to trace the source of his angst......awakening blossoms.......there is nothing to feel sorry about ......there is no one to feel sorry about.......whatever has happened is what life is at that moment..."takshani" ..."at that moment".......He surrenders.......to the moment.......suspension of thoughts.....stillness envelops him......psychological time stops.......there is no future, no past.....no Sita no Raam....neither monsoon neither the absence of it......neither friend nor enemy.......

In that state ...Brahman is revealed......he sees Brahman smiling at him through Sita and through Raavan......the seed that Vashishtah had sown takes root.....it grows....he realises his role in the scheme of things.....he stops fretting and fuming....when the time comes in the form of the present moment he will do what is right at the moment....he taught me never to hold on to any concept as right or wrong , as each moment brings its own knowledge and to make a decision prior to that would be faulty logic.........accepting the enemy's brother as a commander in chief when his counsel suggests otherwise reveals that Raam lived in the present moment......not judging ....he sees reality as it is and this decision of his becomes a crucial factor in his winning the battle...

We adore him not because he killed Raavan.......if not Raam , Raavan would have died a natural death or would have taken to ascetism like parashuram sick of his own wild ways......the gods praised and eulogized him because of his ability to keep the drama out of his life and react to the moment as it is.....

He is a symbol for the average man.......to reduce drama and increase living .....for only when you have lived each and every moment, have you lived life and not merely existed...."

Old memories......

2010-12-13T22:25:00.001-08:00

Something I saw on facebook triggered this.....

My childhood is so vague in my memory.....maybe I was not very attentive as a child.......Those were the days of "chitrahaar" and pepsi cola....:P

It is said that smell is the best trigger of memory ....the smell of "vibhuti" (sacred ash) triggers the vision of my mother in the small enclave in my house in mumbai....
I remember my mother ...fair....beautiful......looking fresh in her 9 yards saree......murmuring incantations ......after the worship she used to force consecrated "prasad" down my throat....and push my head in obeisance towards the laminated photo of our family deity.....

I remember the fights I used to have with my sister......unrecognizable now as a stern matriarch disciplining her children as once my mother did.....
Our fights were legendary......she never backed down and I remember hitting her with my small fists screaming "Dishum" with every wallop I packed....

Battles with my sister were always a lose-lose situation...though I would win the battle by making my mother side with me(I was the younger one so my mother was possessive about me, much to my sisters chagrin). After the fight she would go into the other room and lock herself up.....and how could I let her have all the fun alone...I would knock the door and ask in a gruff voice "what she thought of herself??"......No response....I would then use a more gentler enquiring tone to find out whether she was playing without me and having fun in the process!!!
I can imagine her giggling with suppressed glee while retorting that I may as well say goodbye to the toys which we both shared........Mute rage used to take over me and I would run over to my mother who by this time would have lost interest in our fight and just retort by saying that nowadays I need to pay attention to my studies......I remember thinking how stupid grown-ups were....no sense of priority...the toys were at stake and there was a very good chance my sister may be wreaking havoc with them or worst marrying off He-man and Evelyn....(the He-man doll was my favourite....I had stolen it from my friends house and his sword was moth-eaten)

I specifically remember the clock striking 8:15 p.m......that was the time my father arrived after a punishing day on the Mumbai train.....The moment the bell rang we both would rush for the door........there was a reason for that......my fathers office had a canteen from where he would get us biscuits........that was all he could afford.....he would smile in tired satisfaction as we ruffled through the "red bag" ( He always bought the goodies in the red bag)....Now as I look back I can see the tired eyes of my father.......tiredness from a life which gave him no freedom.......bound him to a chair for 30 years.....he always liked to travel.....A history buff and a naturalist at heart.....he detested being tied to a spot.......someday I hope to take him on a Eurotrip.....

Sundays were good......there used to be Ramayan on TV......and at 2 in the afternoon my friends would call me for playing box cricket.....
I was mortally afraid if someone would suggest over-arm bowling or playing in the ground...since I was very good at thrashing them at under-arm bowling........playing in the ground would mean losing to the guys who I used to make mincemeat of in underarm cricket....:P...
sometimes I would feign stomach ache just to escape playing in the field....
I remember one specific incident which my building friends still refer to......on one such day when I was trying to evade playing in the field...one of the bullies in my building held me the scruff of my shirt and asked me why the little imp thought the field was not good enough for him...
I responded by saying that I am prone to "summer boils" and my mother has strictly prohibited me from playing in the sun.....After 8-9 seconds of stunned silence all of them burst into peals of laughter....because it was winter in Mumbai..:P

Eye of Garuda--II

2010-11-14T05:10:00.000-08:00

The rise of Dhanvantari changes the group dynamics.........as he emerges from the "ksheer sagara".........both asuras and devas vie for his attention......representing the dilemma of an intellectual when he is transforming....
The transformation has been wrought by a balance between the extremes , but the psyche is not sure which side should dominate when the first results of the transformation are seen...

Should the mind wait patiently for the nectar to pour down or rush ahead as this may be the last chance for redemption from the mind.......should the mind drown itself in the bliss of deep meditation giving up day-to-day existence or should it continue the same practice which till now has borne fruits....

When the tussle between the two extremes reaches a point of stalemate......my lord appears.....
His presence soothes everyone.................Vishnu the protector, my master.......the one who worships my lord sees my lord in everything "vasudeva kutumbakam"......because thats what my lord wants them to see......he wants the mind to share its joy......with others.....

My master is for the masses........he believes that every soul has an innate responsibility towards the whole.....he does not want any one overshooting the spirituality curve.........grace shall descend on the individual when he has completed his divine responsibility of helping others.......he will not let the asuric qualities win.......they stand for personal upliftment without thought for the whole......shiva's way.....very personal,aloof,detached.....though there will be followers of this path too......the majority of the masses will have to follow my master's lead........

He transforms into desire , the most instinctive desire that man has known......mohini.....which translates to "that which attracts".....Mohini was a multi-hued goddess , she stood for what each man desires the most according to his stature in life and she is the golden shackle that ties the mind to the earthly existence...she influences both the devas and the asuras......in the devas she is the desire to do good, which is still a desire......a construct of the mind to justify its existence......a last ditch effort by the mind to prove that it is important.....

For the asuras she represents possession....the desire to become overlord of all..... The temptation is too much.......the asuras are smitten by her.......they have to be...they represent instinct.....instinct does not allow contemplation....it forces action.......they try to possess her, each one for himself.....they don't want to share.......my lord does not favour them....if even one of them gains the elixir , he will not share.........

The ones who resist their instinct and stay focussed represent the devas.......tempering their instincts by will they represent the people who vishnu has a bias towards.......the ones who will share their bounty......and who have enough sense to not act instinctively making them better than animals.........

Desire tricks the instinct but helps the strong-willed mind grasp the elixir.........since in the strong-willed mind the desire represents vishnu and not mohini.......the desire to do good.....a good desire......
(to be continued)

Eye of Garuda......

2010-11-09T05:18:00.000-08:00

Instead of insipid blogs, I have decided to explore the rich Indian mythology and explain it through the eyes of Garuda.....the eagle god......who impressed Vishnu by his prowess.....
Why garuda ?? would be a valid question.....but imagine to be tethered to the supreme god vishnu and still not be able to merge with him.......must be killing him :P.....to reduce his agony , I dedicate the observations made by me to Garuda......:P

Lets look at what the ancients tried to convey through "samudra Manthan"....

The story begins with Indra being cursed by Durvasa for being indifferent towards his gift to Indra.....symbolising that every change or strenuous activity has its roots in indifference and boredom, a non appreciation of the existing splendor that mother earth bestows on us.

Advised by vishnu the devas and asuras start churning the "Milky Ocean" to gain vigour and strength from its gifts.
As vishnu arrives on the scene astride Garuda.....he contemplates.....

"What a sight......both extremes(devas and asuras) combine together for a common cause, by sublimating their base natures.......as the butter is churned out of the ocean, so does the ocean throw out its wealth for the individual who strives to go against his nature and tries to bring change in his life......"

"The devas represent the benign qualities of the mind......humility, kindness , effort....which are required in the requisite amount to lead a balanced life in society.......the asuras represent the impulsive nature within him .....anger, passion, pride which though intense are required for the individual if he is trying to change or revolutionise his character......Without the asuric qualities of pride and passion he will not be able to withstand the backlash of society when he tries to change , in the process becoming a hypocrite in the eyes of his fellowmen....."

"The milky ocean ......represents the frothing , bubbling mind......initially it spews "Halahala", the deadly poison.......which can consume the entire psyche of the individual.....transformation is not a joke and as a side effect the psyche contorts....believing what it wants to believe resembling an elephant in rut.....the poison needs to be consumed by one other than the individual....enter shiva......the tamasic lord...., he consumes the poison....Shiva in the human psyche is the ability to be non-reactive....indifferent to the plays of the mind......introverted and ever present in brahman , shiva represents an escape for the psyche when it threatens to engulf the consciousness by the poisonous thoughts of guilt and anger......when the individual goes into a contemplative state, his own poisonous thoughts are consumed......making the presence of shiva a crucial moment in the transformation.....without him there is annihilation of the psyche......ironically the dark lord acts as the savior untrue to his nature of destruction......symbolising that when an individual changes even the gods change their shades...mirroring him...encouraging him....."

"Material splendor enamoring the mind is created by the mind itself.......ucchaishrava the white horse. walks out of the ocean.......represents the prancing and galloping nature of the mind.....the horse is elegant...so are thoughts....it is a conscious decision to either go behind the horse or stay put for the final reward...."amrit".....nectar of immortality......

subsequently follows "Lakshmi" the goddess of wealth.....she is enchanting......having the ability to fulfill all needs ...she is the epitome of capitalistic consumerism and greed......and she knows it.......wealth has its significance only when channelised and not when hoarded.....she slowly moves towards my lord and garlands him.......he is beyond desires and will not hoard her but will channelise her gifts to the deserving poor....he will hold the purse strings , thus retaining absolute control......

Finally dhanvantari , the god of health and well being emerges holding the pot of nectar......I observe , from the mind comes the elixir for immortality.......when all other desires are emptied from the "milky mind"......what remains is a healthy , balanced, sober , clear mind which is ready to receive the elixir of immortality.....

(to be continued)

The influence.....

2010-11-06T17:00:00.000-07:00

"Rules and prohibitions are transcended,nothing is right or wrong, He is above all"-----description of the "perfect" sage by Ashtavakra samhita......
There are certain lines which keep repeating in your head while doing mundane activities or while the mind is performing its routine mischief of jumping from thought to thought....

To some extent , this stage can be reached by the experiences to which the mind is subject to.
Experience and influence being so important in an aspirants life, I find it difficult to believe so many people reached this stage by divorcing themselves from society.

To prove my point ,there are a couple of influences which came from unexpected quarters.....

I met by career services advisor a week ago to talk about an internship. The initial phase of the interview was awkward, both of us acutely aware that behind the apparent goodwill, there was a reason why I came to meet her.....to get leads about the companies to follow....
I was disgusted with myself for using her only for that and not respecting her as an individual.I had fixed an appointment for 15 minutes and had come prepared. Something snapped within me(I call that God...:P) and I asked "when we first met you mentioned that you had gone to japan , just to get away from it all, If I may ask ,why did you go??"

for a moment she stared at me....I guess when you are really interested ,it shows in your demeanor, she talked about her conventional chinese parentage, the unwillingness to let her go to a foreign country.....
The trepidation of whether she will survive the new industry, and most importantly.....the exhilaration when she realized that she could do "anything".......

Its a thing with the human brain, when it encounters the expansion of its limitations in one aspect of existence.......it contemplates..... beautiful mind......realizes that it can beat down all barriers.....and she experienced the same thing.....

For a moment her eyes lit up and exclaimed that it was the best year of her life, the mind was realizing its extent to grow.....at that point we empathized , because I have been experiencing that for the last couple of months......the 15 min interview went upto an hour:P
I listened as I heard the mind of one who was more mature and contemplative than mine......information datamine........
As i mentioned earlier , when we go to a headhunter thats the least on our minds....to connect behind the polished exterior was so much fun.....and I have realised my ability to do that.......what a mindblowing thing to do.......to spark and connect......

The second influence came from watching random videos in youtube.......came across the video of a guy called Eckhart Tolle......physically unimposing......he spoke of the art of focussing on the surrounding so intensely that you are in the present , every second such that only the present exists, tried that for a couple of days and saw that my concentration skills have gone up considerably, I read people when they are trying to explain something and fill their conversations.....irritatingly so...:P.....but its again telling my mind not to argue for its own limitations...

The third influence came from my roommate who believes in class among people......he treats class as something expressed through someone's demeanour and in general dressing sense.....which is irritatingly immature if not downright stupid......

Class comes from taking up challenges, winning .....watching our own mindset as it changes , feeling the exhilaration of challenging and defeating ones own limited thinking.....and maintaning it as a way of life...
Even smaller things, like going up to a girl in a bar , though trivial may do wonders for the self-esteem/class...

I have a good friend who is appearing for a public exam and we had this conversation as to how to improvise on one's personality so that we could create an impact on peoples mind....
today after 8 months I think I am closer to the answer.......His answer would lie more in taking up radical ideas however silly they may be......he need not even tell anyone about it......and watch the decision change his life...the problem with us is that we have goals which take years to complete and we miss out on the smaller challenges....... which keep the drive to experiment alive and which eventually may transform us in unthinkable ways,....

the class which comes from such experiences would be mindblowing.......it would be from ones own
experience, forged in ones own mind.....courage from ones own gut...acceptance from ones own humility....who can beat such a guy......untouchable and irresistible....
I have half a mind to go blast guys who think they can judge people based on which designer company they buy from and which deodorant they use.....

If that is class...then I think its better if we don't have it......I would rather have "attitude" which comes from within myself by my efforts and not from wearing shades of "Ray-Ban"...
I still think that my friend who is maybe 5'6" and doesn't accesorize has far more guts and "Dil' than my other "friends" who believe that they have conquered their surrounding by wearing "D&G"....

Compare all the three influences.....independent but affecting the mind from all directions....pulling it apart .......enlarging it.....exhilarating it.....3 dimensions.....
"Basic need", "spiritual" and "practical"......Science says that there are in all 11 dimensions...we operate only in 3.....in some part of the universe there is a being who operates in the 4th dimension also.....time....that entity would traverse in time too.....

the important question is how Do I reach there....Maybe by challenging my own mind.......maybe the mind has all the dimensions in it.....when I expand it....I will be able to traverse in time too....:P...and maybe date aishwarya rai before she became Miss world......

The Pub night

2010-10-20T06:42:00.000-07:00

Pubbing ......very different meaning when you enter the US of A.
Back in India.....when I used to go with my friends....pubbing mainly referred to going to a shady smoke filled bar with lot of people jammed into a tiny space.
Go on drinking until the limits of consciousness were stretched...all the while reiterating that I was not drunk and I would not have someone say otherwise...:P

Out here in Boston, pubbing is a way to meet people socially....getting drunk and behaving like an ass is a strict no-no. The first pub night that I attended....I was lost as usual......standing on the sidelines awkwardly holding a beer I was the picture of "FOB" (Fresh of the boat).

Did try to get into a game of snooker with a couple of chinese...who played so well I wondered why they didn't take it up professionally.

There is an unspoken contract between Desis when we meet in a pub(before we had our drinks)......though we may have shared food in the same vessel.....out in the open we dare not show that we are good friends :P....
It's just a casual "How you doing man"?/....and just move on to the next chinese or american.

For us international students even pubbing is an event to be taken seriously.......every occasion is a golden knock by the elusive contact who would finally hook us up with our "dream" job.

I was told by my seniors to move around with as many people I could find....of course there are political sidelines.....there is the distinctive line between the I.T and Finance guys.....since I belong to both the families.....I am a favourite of neither party :P.....

But as it's said all facade fade when the level of alcohol in the blood increases beyond a certain point......As the glasses on the table pile up......we desis start forming small groups or cocoons I should say.......slowly the camraderie builds and then the fun begins....:P

The talk shifts from being sophisticated to "who was seen in whose room "......:P.....why certain females resemble the female counterpart of a dog...and why certain males are like serpents in the garden of eden...:P

Ahhhh....Pure joy.....I always tire quickly of appearing sophisticated and am normally the first ones to become truly desi on the pub floor....scaring away the poor americans with my loud , boisterous talk....:P.....I have been warned many times that if this continues the number of friends that I have will be limited to single digits.....

Desi girls do visit these pub's just to be part of the "In" crowd.....lot of us try our luck....:P.....surreptiously building an image that we hope the female would start to like......but the female species always in possession of their wits .......play along with us.....encouraging all our overtures.....finally to introduce us to their boyfriends....who was always in the shade laughing his ass off at us...:P.....

whatever may be the result......I am better off attending these events ...as they let me make a fool of myself...:P.....making me realize that its the fools and the irrational idiots who have all the fun....

Enthiran...Thailavaaaaaaaaaaaa....:P

2010-10-03T06:08:00.000-07:00

Thailavaaaa....:P......a blood curdling yell greeted me as I entered the cinema hall in Boston, wondering how "demi god" Rajni would be received by the people here....

God is truly omnipotent....nay maybe more potent in USA ...as we pay 30$ for a seat to enjoy his antics........Setting aside the fact that we may be converting Mr. Maran's Black moolah to white......Enthiran is a superb pot-broiler......

A slightly aging Aishwarya looks perfect for Rajni........As his image panned across the screen I found myself being swept in the Adrenaline-rush.....To my own chagrin I found myself standing up and hooting into the air...enjoying the rush that comes with being primeval....

That's the thing I guess.....hero-worship does work wonders.....I found my sober mindset again coming out of the mundane groove...and trying to put myself into the actor's shoes......For a couple of hours I forgot that I need to save dollars, get an internship....maybe apply to a couple of companies......living in the moment.....I was thrilled.....hair standing on end.....what mattered was whether Aishwarya is saved form the clutches of Baddie Robo Rajni......

The story if I am not wrong comes from an author who goes by the pen-name "sujatha"....a very renowned Tamil author who apparently revolutionized the thinking of the masses......
I am yet to read his works but I have been told that his writings are beautifully descriptive and I have always been fascinated by the descriptive/romantic style of Tamil language....

I think I miss out on a lot of such good authors, who write only in the regional language......if there was an "enthiram" to convert each book into english with the emotions intact......what a transfer of ideas it would be........

or maybe a Binary language/common substratum which each human could understand instinctively, could help the transfer of ideas more easily...:P

Coming back to the movie......Robo Rajni gets "corrupted" by the human baser emotions which apparently makes us different from the animals....sentience....is brutally punished .....as the baser emotions can be solely enjoyed by the one who is created by nature.....and not one created by man.....sort of the same expectation we have from men of god......

If a young man commits youthful indiscretions....he is maybe forgiven by a puritan society......but not so in the case of holy men....slight deviation from what society expects from them and they are torn apart.....because we want to see them fall....what greater joy than seeing a highly evolved person being subject to the same dilemmas that we face and succumb to it....:P

Obviously in the end..."human" Rajni triumphs,....but somewhere deep down I wanted the "Robo" Rajni to take home the bacon......He was the better guy here....he just obeyed his instincts without seeming hypocritical and says candidly "I want Sana (Aishwaryas character) DOT"......simple...I want it and I will have it.......

A better climax would have been if Robo Rajni impregnates Aishwaryas character and creates the Robo sapien.......and then finally realizes that Life is more than wanting and having ......poisoned by intellect undergo the same existential dilemma that homo sapien goes through but with the additional cross of immortality......

Irrespective...Thalaivaaa rocks...solely for his ability to create mass hysteria....for giving me a high on life......making me understand that life is enjoyed in momentous spurts and for providing me with a enjoyable time slot in the time-space curve :P:P

Organized Americans , inscrutable Indians

2010-09-19T22:14:00.000-07:00

Before I came to the land of "milk and honey" , I was told by a friend to read the "Inscrutable Americans" .....a book journeying through the mind set of an Indian guy in USA......

Nothing what I experience here matches what the book endorsed.......American's are very organized, in the sense , every day is slotted into compartments, each minute justified ......and it unsettles them if things don't go according to the plan......there is no concept of "jugaad".....rules are meant to be followed.....what is the point otherwise??? there is no "workaround".......
A very organized set of people......and given very much to politeness and grace....

Then we have us.....the lack of "jugaad" is very irritating.....be it any institution...we try to find loopholes....ways to enter the organization in ways which an organized mind cannot think of...because of artificial limitations of rules and conduct.....

It' beautiful to see the two opposing forces merge and entwine in Boston where I stay.....The americans surprised at the resourcefulness of the Indians and the Indians wondering whether there exists such a place where things get done in time and people actually honour their commitment.....

The other day my roommate expalined a beautiful concept...in which destiny of an individual doesn't depend on him alone......its also the effect of the collective or group to which he belongs.....sort of a corollary of the "butterfly effect"......i.e. the triggering and happening of significant events by apparently uneventful and insignificant trifles......

USA to some extent has made me lesser of a misanthrope than I was.......maybe its the collective karma of the country.......here oppurtunity is not gained by hiding the event from a fellowman....rather it is thrown open to all....and since the americans respect individualism......the person who stands out the most wins......since he has the potential to bring change to a sleeping society....it is the iconoclast who is revered.......the fear of non conformance melts into the sense of doing things differently.......where the society doesnt punish you for being radical.....

Not to say less about the collective indian Karma.......friendships bred in the soil of the indian subcontinent cannot be withered away by even the harshest chills.......friendship which blooms with no ulterior motive.....but only for a few.......a place where doing nothing "akarma" among the mendicants is revered.....achievement is not everything....being part of a flock is acceptable...nay encouraged......as safety lies in not standing out but merging.....

So what is the right way.......on one side are the people who live life dynamically.....but lose out on relationships...on the other hand we have people who are blessed by the gods as regards family and relationships.....but do not propel the society ahead.......

The more I contemplate , the more I realize the way lies in being a hypocrite........why is it wrong to change your views everyday.....what has the world gained by steadfastedness......Being a hypocrite is not wrong...its just conforming to the current trend of events....being malleable ..to extract more out of life......what is life ...if not a set of contradictions.....people married to spouses who they dont care about for their entire life...people hurting the ones they love the most.......isnt it the only way to behave in a life where being steadfast just makes you passe.....

Will of Tripura

2010-09-04T04:16:00.001-07:00

Anyone who has experienced the beauty of silence...also understands the presence of a will, which crafts the intricacies of the mundane life......

This "will" decides that part of life which not even the west has been able to organize or compartmentalize and which the east refers to as "naseeb"....

Whatever maybe the effort , the ability , there comes a point in the event of things when "naseeb" has to take your side.......
Till late my vacillating mind did not approve of either "naseeb" or disapprove of its existence.....

This has led finally to a dilemma which may finally culminate in a major lifestyle attitude......., in the sense that paths at this crossroad are spaced out too far to find a middle path.......

empirical evidence has failed .......i.e. I have tried walking down both of the paths and have realised that both of them behave differently in different circumstances.....

The "eastern" part of me insists that the path of vairagya "detached enjoyment" is the golden road.....in the sense......the individual should be like a lazy python , devouring whatever comes to him but never disturbing his own lethargy to find even the basic necessities of life.....
When for a few days , I took up this attitude towards my daily routine........I felt great peace...as there was nothing to plan for....nothing to look forward to, spontaneity went to the utmost extent ..as in every moment was enjoyed without thought of it's consequence.....
and ......."naseeb" took over......things unplanned and unsought for came into my hands......as if I was being rewarded for making the right choice......

"naseeb" is peculiar in the sense for when things fall into your hands they would be much more better and fulfilling than if sought for.......but......the "cloudy lining for this silver cloud" is answering questions which arise periodically questioning the goal of life...since spontaneity doesn't allow even the presence of the next instant....forget about the five year plan....
In interviews I was stumped when I was asked what do want to become in life.....what was my 5 year plan.....these questions cannot be put to the follower of any spiritual discipline......He is already that...what more planning could be done....the goal is to enjoy the spontaneity of every moment.......without taking to heart both the good as well as the not-so-good events of life....

Then things didn't go my way, I was denied oppurtunities, whatever I touched was doomed to a fatal finish...making me wonder what went wrong......again the presence of the "will"......I slowly realised that "naseeb" has only one motivation.....to exhaust whatever proclivities of the mind are present so that the individual experiences the peace of the undisturbed mind....

To understand the peace of an undisturbed mind, the mind has to be shown the presence of the"peace" first , to clear the misconception that such a state does not exist...to make the individual a believer....not by hearsay but by empirical practical experience........after soaking the individual in the peace , the "will" decides to disturb him.......and this is the most difficult phase........the individual has now become like the pupa in a cocoon...he doesn't want to make difficult choices.....he is happy in being docile......He wants no hand in changing himself......a belief that if "I am away from the world I will not be disturbed" takes root....

But the "will" , is all knowing....in fact it is present in each individual making them go through the rigmarole......but this is the point where major aspirants buckle.....
the misery does not end until the individual lets go of his conception that he will not mingle with the world......he has no option, the presence of a body and mind entails action.....not even the gods escape action.....now he has to learn to keep his mind peaceful even in times of turbulence.....which is what the "will" wants, a "peace" that has been earned and not bestowed....

For this to happen the grace of the "will" has to be withdrawn first , for if the child has to walk the mother has to let go......lot of the aspirants don't want to walk.....they will never walk...atleast not in this lifetime.......lot of them do walk....for they have truly felt the bliss of the "will".......its infuriating to be not so peaceful again...:D.....

When this agenda of the "will" is understood.........again the grace shines forth....the path to the goal has been set....now the aspirant will not meander in the grassy meadows of mind-pleasures.....and the "will" has achieved its purpose....life has gained a meaning.....as a sentence is meaningful only when its terminated by a full stop.

Tripura rahasya......mystery beyond the trinity.....

2010-08-29T19:42:00.000-07:00

Chance.....or am I assuming too much as I say this......brought a book "tripura rahasya" to me.....
The book seemed alright with the cover nicely embossed and priced at 250 bucks.....I lingered around a bit in the bookstore to check whether I could buy something else....maybe a who-dunnit or maybe the latest cosmo....

Any moment my friend would be at the bookstore to pick me up....hastily I picked up the book , paid the cashier and convinced myself that reading comedy and comics alone won't give me material enough to write....

After dinner , I picked up the book......it said something about a devotee who had devoted a couple of years in translating it in English...."loser" echoed my mind.....to waste precious life in translating stuff when it could have been enjoyed otherwise....but the book completed change my perception of vedanta....

The book is a dialogue between Dattatreya , the Indian epitome of guruhood.....popularly known as the avadhuta...someone who doesn't follow the normal social rules of conduct.....and parashurama .....son of sage jamadagni...one of the avatars of vishnu...the preserver god....

Dwaita...dualism represented by parashurama.....a form of god who knows the truth but still believes in enjoying and being part of it without getting involved.....and adwaita represented by dattatreya the avatar of shiva....the ascetic lord.......who is so sensitive to pain and rejection , that he draws himself into a cocoon not even accessible to his own spouse....who he believes is responsible for drawing him out in the first place.....

the book teaches the dwaitins the errors of their ways in getting involved with the world...when in effect the entire world is a dream based on the sleeping vishnu's dream....
dattaterya allegorically explains with the help of stories , the various modes of worship and why each form of worship evolved.....

According to the hindu.....there is no apocalypse......there is no end.....things are always cyclical....only eternity and infinity is real......the western concept of final dissolution is just one phase of the cycle when vishnu rises from his sleep.....breaking his dream which in effect dissolves our world.....Eventually again he will sleep , dreaming worlds into existence...

A fascinating outlook on the concept of god granting boons to devotees is explained in the book...
According to dattatreya ....whenever a being rises above the human perception through the five senses....i.e. he consciously rejects the sensory inputs.....these inputs are the medium through which vishnu maintains the sleep of the individual consciousness.....thus preventing the individual from ever realizing that he himself is part of the all-knowing consciousness....of which even vishnu is a form.....it is a game in which the consciouness-vishnu deludes the consciosuness-man so that in effect the world of pain and pleasure could be enjoyed....

so when a devotee dhruva steadfastedly draws himself away from the world......he starts disconnecting himself from the illusory world....in the process realizing that he need not strive.....for what has one to do to become oneself......brings to mind the parable of chrsit "be still and know that I am god"...a more apt description would have been "be still and know that you are god"....

when dhruva attempts to wake up.....he is thwarting the original divine plan of wanting to enjoy duality.... which prompts vishnu to make an appearance and grant him boons...in effect binding him with illusory boons to the illusory world......

Dattatreya tries to explain that since vishnu is the creator of the dream he has power to grant invincibility to the dream residents as he just has to will or wish it.....and he still is the all-powerful , as just by waking up he can smash to smithereens the world of men....

dattareya extols parashuram to realise this and tells him the secret......the core of advaita....that each of us can create world out of nothing if we will so....if we focus our energies to do so......
He himslef explains the case of vishwamitra who by the powers of penance and concentration is able to create a parallel universe for trishanku when he is denied entrance into indra's heaven.

A very daring concept..nihilistic to the core...forms the basis of tripura rahasya...which throws aside worship, deities and even the trinity , plunging straight into the heart of consciuousness ...

a must read for all the vedantic enthusiasts.....who are tired of wrestling out meaning from the ramayan and mahabharaat....which are nothing but cock an bull stories in front of tripura rahasya.......

Adventures of Bob

2010-08-26T04:07:00.000-07:00

Aloha phrends.....or wazup dude/dudette......
Today I wil unleash upon you the doings of bob a.k.a. me, who pretty much himself doesn't know what he is upto...

The past 1 month has been surreal, since I shifted to the US of A , apparently to study and pursue my passion of teaching financial planning to the world.
Every morning I get up , expecting my mom to hand me a sizzling cup of "jaaago re" tea, but for that she would have to travel quite a long distance.:P

I take my instant bru cold coffee....and stare out of the window....looking at people engrossed int their own lives....like I was back in India.

Being an alien in a foreign country, makes you realise that all over the world people are the same, oblivious to how the other three quarters of the world lives like.....

The stereotypes are the same, the aggressive banker in bank of america, the concerned neighbour, the frightened to wits freshman students.....not much has changed except the scenery......

There is nothing called as "change of place" I have realised......we carry
our baggage with us wherever we go, projecting the same world and evoking the same feelings as before.....

To experiece a more wholesome life, rather than shifting places....I think we should change friends :P......that in fact gives a more fresher perspective than migration.

Maybe I havent made much friends out here, which gives me the feeling of not connecting with the place......I appear like a carricature drawn within a beautiful scenery, who the artist realises , could have been avoided.....:P

I read a beautiful blog , where the authoress very accurately points out the reason for monotony and boredom but fails when it comes to giving a solution , or maybe ther is'nt one.....

Anyways, these events have definitely made me enjoy life as small pockets of happiness, which are spontaneous and in the present...and not as a quest for a greater utopian paradise......Maybe this is what is known as maturity ...:P

Iconoclasts......direct dil se......

2010-07-24T10:13:00.000-07:00

The word......if you search in the web for the definition.....depicts it as someone who revels in breaking rules......or rigid conventional thought process......
Though I would like to look at myself in this benign light.....it would be hypocritical ...:P.....

My life need not be even studied....if you have seen a south Indian I.T guy....you have seen us all.......There is not much we do....except create the next gene pool......To be fair , the circumstance in which we grow up are the same....hence the lack of variety.....the lack of broad colorful strokes....which make life all the more interesting......people who have small beautiful characteristics are missing......which cannot be experienced in a group of similar minded people......In the bigger scheme of things....chaos is actually a pre-requisite for a complete life.....

As beautiful middle age dawns on me....slowly I feel myself letting go of conventions which I held sacred as a teen.......the mind-numbing need to be like others is slowly losing its grip on me....

As a kid, brought up with strictly orthodox views....I could not view pre-marital sex without a jaundiced eye.....It always felt wrong..something did not seem to fit the slot in my mind....the mind already had pre-conceived grooves....anything which did not conform to it..was vigorously denied or ignored......

But as I see the various compromises that a couple go through in the name of marriage......I am beginning to feel whether it would be so bad if we did not look askance at people who decide to spend their life together without society's sanction , withstanding societies baleful glances.....

These couples seem to cope better with the society actually, they are happy.....they don't impose themselves on each other.....

In actuality any activity or decision , may it be social or political has to end in chaos, such is the logic of the dualistic world, there is always some sector which grumbles at the lack of attention......
In such a society , it is futile to equate happiness with any specific goal......
rather it is the process which is the goal...

The process makes or mars the man or woman.....when either of the individual loses out on such an experience......there is an undercurrent of repressed anger which manifests in expectation from the other person in the relationship.....
A dependency or expectation of appreciation from anyone is one of the worst things to happen to any individual.....

Dreams, ambitions which in effect are not of any consequence , but the pursuit of which makes each man or woman realize himself or herself......is a very important journey that each individual , man or woman needs to undergo....which is missed out in the name of "commitment"......

Instead of leading a contented and satisfied life, the person becomes a slave to opinions of irrelevant people, as self worth has reduced to mere opinion of idiotic people....in fact making him conform more and more to societies idiotic rules......adding one more to the city of dead......

As of now....the heart desires the childish enthusiasm of waiting for my sister to come home so that I could fight with her as I used to when I was a kid..........not even childlike....it has to be a childish pleasure.......

The adults with their make believe world tire me........they don't know fun....in fact they have forgotten how it feels......going to pubs on weekends , dancing to loud music is fun.....but it cannot replace the fun which I had when playing under-arm box cricket with the street urchins next to my friends building ......

Children who were daily belted by their drunk father and did not have enough money to buy a pair of decent clothes, but still managed to contribute 3 Rs per head for buying a rubber-ball.I really enjoyed those days.....the maximum fun I have nowadays is with some boring colleague , who explains why he is the alpha and omega of some XYZ corporation...where obviously he is irreplacable...:P....

The decision is taken........childishness is what I want...and what I will have.......I have enough of friends telling me to maintain a professional image so that people may "respect" me......I think I am ok .....and I guess people should enjoy my company rather than be in reverential awe ......

My job is ok.....and my company can easily find a replacement for me...and no this is not any loser self-degrading self empathy or sympathy.....its the truth....and is applicable to even the CEO of TCS or Infosys.....or any other MNC.......
everybody is expendable.....If a world could go without a rama , krishna or jesus....it should definitely be able to move ahead without us.....

I miss out on my friends .......who never sat lectures in college.......always took life in their stride.....thought with their hearts......revered friendship ...and went even to the extent of helping others at the cost of their own careers....

I miss that childish part of myself....which did things because they felt right.....not because they would lead to a better carrer path or better prospects.....

So listen ye gods :P........Let not me embrace drudgery in the name of maturity....keep me stupid....and childish....for wisdom lies in the toothless smile of a child rather than in the weak/fake smile of an adult.........

Tagore.....

2010-06-28T03:30:00.000-07:00

"Why these preparations without end?"—I said to Mind—"Is some one to come?"
Mind replied, "I am enormously busy gathering things and building towers. I have no time to answer such questions."
Meekly I went back to my work.
When things were grown to a pile, when seven wings of his palace were complete, I said to Mind, "Is it not enough?"
Mind began to say, "Not enough to contain—" and then stopped.
"Contain what?" I asked.
Mind affected not to hear.
I suspected that Mind did not know, and with ceaseless work smothered the question.
His one refrain was, "I must have more."
"Why must you?"
"Because it is great."
"What is great?"
Mind remained silent. I pressed for an answer.

In contempt and anger, Mind said, "Why ask about things that are not? Take notice of those that are hugely before you,—the struggle and the fight, the army and armaments, the bricks and mortar, and labourers without number."

I thought "Possibly Mind is wise."
The lofty building lies in the dust and all is scattered and broken.
Mind looked about. But what was there to see?
Only the morning star and the lily washed in dew.
And what else? A child running laughing from its mother's arms into the open light.
"Was it only for this that they said it was the day of the Coming?"
"Yes, this was why they said there was music in the air and light in the sky."
"And did they claim all the earth only for this?"
"Yes," came the answer. "Mind, you build walls to imprison yourself. Your servants toil to enslave themselves; but the whole earth and infinite space are for the child, for the New Life."

"What does that child bring you?"
"Hope for all the world and its joy."
Mind asked me, "Poet, do you understand?"

"I lay my work aside," I said, "for I must have time to understand.""
-----Written by "Tagore"

Today I attempt to write an eulogy to the brilliant Tagore......to even understand and appreciate Tagore requires a contemplative bent of mind.....to the superficial mind which thrives on sensationalism and vulgar entertainment, Tagore's poems are just irrelevant, loose-in-detail songs , shoddy and with no definite theme....

But a mind which though mature in its reflections holds the child's innocence in high esteem will definitely accept Tagore's brilliance.

Such poignancy rarely have I come across.....in the above poem Tagore gives life to the eternal conflict within man to either succumb to monotony or live in the eternal spontaneous creativity which his mind exhibits when not dragged down by the worldly cares.....

The initial para.....reflects the mind working incessantly and the poet as an observer questions the mind about the "purpose" of the incessant working....

The mind , if you observe, typical to its nature , creates an artificial aura of importance, which when closely analysed vanishes into thin air....the poet though he understands this,....refuses to rebel....simply because though he knows the minds stupidity.....there is no other anchor where he can hold himself steady......he has still not found his moorings....

By rationalizing that the mind maybe wise , he makes peace with himself....

If we observe.....Tagore clearly points out the childish rituals and falsified sense of duty by which our mind/intellect binds us....what do we need???.....how would I know??....We have always listened to the mind.....who propelled us to crave for social security, position and false notions of responsibility.........whatever truly matters takes place without our interference....

The body moves and breathes according to the brilliantly built nervous system.....if all our bodily functions depended on us...then heaven help us.....a kind God has seen to it that atleast the vital functions are independent of our doings.....

this is the sublime impression that Tagore conveys.......though work needs to be done.....why the long face???......whatever is of importance is already been taken care of.....why then the urgency....why the need to convince anyone we meet, about the importance of what we do.....

Mainly ....nowadays I have observed......friends of my childhood rather than introducing themselves , introduce their job profiles to me......what is the need to do that??....
When we were children, I did not know whether you would be a scoundrel or a political reformer......what mattered was camaraderie........what mattered was whether we could share some common grounds where we could empathize with each others problems and grow mutually....

It still does.......Tagore brilliantly conveys this message.......a message which has gained in meaning as it comes hurtling across half a century........

This monster mind has taken over our lives, demanding at its altar the sacrifice of spontaneity
, no more , says Tagore let it be-fool you......
It has no basis, no argument to defend.....other than turning a blind eye to reason.....the mind has no hope against the philosopher who looks it in the eye and demands an explanation for its mischief.....

The final para's show the awakening of the human intellect to the simple joy of a child running into the light......again Tagore brilliantly portrays the defeat of the adult mind at the hands of a child.....at the hands of innocence.....

An adult businessman......is most happy when he comes home to his children and plays with them, satisfying their every whim.......the man....who during the day works in vain to relieve his debt to the mind...defeats it in an instant when he throws aside the shackles that bind him when he meets his child.....

Tagore , exhorts us to just push our horizon a bit......have a peep at the mind from a higher altitude......know its working and dominate the mind as a child does....

A child who reigns supreme as the king of his empire....free as a lark .....in comparison to his adult counterpart...who is just nothing but a well-dressed and responsible beggar.....

the beauty of slow motion.....

2010-06-27T04:21:00.000-07:00

Ever had the feeling as if you are a spectator, watching the kaleidoscope of experiences that we call life ......

Its as if ....the same reel is running slowly .....perpetrating a senseless deja-vu.......

I have noticed ....only a few realize this.....the others never stop and reflect.....sometimes the carnal thirst to win at every cost is so high that the repetitive staleness of life is given a miss-in-baulk.....

Maybe it is the putrid staleness ....that makes one run in the first place.....the attention is so much on the outcome that life seems like a couple of milestones in the beginning.....

only in the beginning................eventually .........there is a part of the human consciousness which somehow detaches itself from the rigmarole of stupidity and watches with a profound detachment the happenings..........

..beautifully silent.....ever aware ...neither self-pitying nor attempting to dramatize the trivial.....this beautiful detachment dawns unaware ......as the sun's beautiful "rays" in the morning.....in sanskrit it's called "aruna" the charioteer of the sun-god......the one who heralds the beginning of dawn.....she looks on from an Olympian height the convolutions of destinies paths as it grinds each man beneath its unyielding heel.....

....maybe this is what the ancient seers meant by "soul".....the "spirit" within......never sleeping, always blissfully aware.....never subject to the machinations of the pilfering , ever-blabbering mind.....

She doesn't have the mind's irritating habit of cross-talk, attempting to justify its every action....."she is".....always.....existing peacefully........

Her purity so unalloyed that even the rush of "ecstatic happiness" seems like a disturbance.....it makes even euphoria look like a gregarious impostor....

Maybe this is what the ancient meant by the "peace that passeth all understanding".......which is not dependent on any object for its arousal.....
a happiness so pure.......her very existence is healing and purifying.......there is no stench of greed, imperfection and longing to be completed...

its already complete.....what more can she add to herself....any addition will just make her imperfect....both pain and pleasure mar her rich beauty...maybe this is why the meaning of "vishnu" is also the "one for whom pleasure and pain are alike"......the underlying note on which the mind dares to enact its play......

when the play finishes......its beautiful again.......the purity is regained......it was always there....ever "shiva" ....ever auspiciousness.....
the nectarine silence........mother of all thoughts and words......how can language describe her......

For language has an apex.........its pinnacle is to express the sublimest of thoughts.....but not silence........maybe that why the ancients said that "she" could not be described by words............words are limited by thought and who can voice something which is not cloaked by thought.....

Maybe that's why the eternal thirst for objects which are beautiful.............beauty which stuns the onlooker into silence.......true beauty does not excite......it soothes......its gentle caress erases out the wrinkles of thoughts.........

the silence that a paramour feels on embracing her secret beloved........is a reflection of the eternal goddess of silence.....

When the embrace is complete....all longing...all desire are stunned into silence for a fleeting moment.....again providing for a split second....the glimpse of reality.......what sublime bliss......

beauty does reflect god's face.....at least for an instant........

The wise recognize the original longing behind the sensual craving.....they understand their true need.....they see the goddess smiling behind the veils....

the search begins for the elusive mistress of silence.......ever she observes her child......tempting and teasing him.......she knows he will find her in the end......

she laughs as he tries to understand her....trying to cloak her with symbols and words........how she laughs.......she has to teach him.....guide him temptingly......he is innocent like a new born baby......trying to grasp his own shadow....and angry when the sun takes the shadow away........

eventually he tries to win her through action.....again she foils him ........how can the inactive mistress of silence be gained through selfish, gross ever-volatile action.......

But the action provides a balm......he feels like he is actively searching for her.....applying himself through the worldly grind,....he desperately hopes she would notice his misery.......but the goddess needs surrender from her child.....at heart a woman.......she knows how to comfort and relive the burden....what can she do......if he does not want to be comforted......

As he sits tired and angry at the world.......he surrenders .......unknowingly.......without reservation.......not attempting to find or question her.....like a child.......unreservedly....unconditionally.......a love that only a child and his mother can understand.........

a bond that does not require constant rationalization nor any tag...........nor justification nor secrecy......

Maybe that's why the "buddha" became the "sakta" as the "shakti" enlightened him.....born a warrior .....he tried everything.....before finally falling asleep in her lap.....

It was not the "bodhi tree" which was responsible for his bliss........his heart was pure ....and at that instant the eternal silence took over.......

The mother of all names and forms..........as we retrace.....we see her true nature.......elusively hidden..........captivatingly beautiful......visible only to the wise....ever cheerful.....beauty personified.....

A beauty so pure that even describing it renders it impure.....

the only way to eulogize her is to close the eyes....and merge within....watch her as she plays with her own myriad forms.....what more is required......

Shiva.....

2010-06-20T04:33:00.000-07:00

I would request my readers to skip this post if you are not subject to dark, melancholy moods......coz if you are not this article will definitely make you eat your own eyeball :P
....again all in an attempt to discover my own writing capabilities.....

Scene: Shiva after sati immolates herself in daksha's yagna
(shiva in contemplation)

Shivohum.........I am he........eternally......always alone......forged by one of the moods of nature...I am Shiva.....The tamasic......Death.....rebirth....disease......I own them all.....

Who was I born to....where will be my end....even I am not sure....I am nature itself......plagued by the curse to bring death......I love none and am beyond the emotions of attachment.......

The universal law holds me responsible to make mankind realize the futility of all their attempts and hopes.....disregard their every prayer.....so that finally they know the universal law .....the sublime truth underlying all....

Only I have the discrimination to actually see my children as they actually are.....unbiased.....unjudging.....I hold everyone close to me.....

Paradox am I....Shivohum.......unattached yet ever concerned.....given the gruesome task of revealing the truth......

Only one could ever know me......sati........the universal law had to create polarity for every being.....their merger resulting in "shunyata".....the eternal silence.....for every good thought a polar negation had to be created.....

I was entrusted to keep the balance of darkness........protect the undead.....the social outcasts....my children......she was my polarity.....The perfect negation.....

Without her existence the world will not be able to bear my wrath......as I watched over the spirits ...she watched over the suras.....the other polarity........in essence the same....we cannot exist without the other......

without her, its best to recede.......Always my refuge.... into the eternal silence.....where I dont need to even be conscious of myself......again maintaining the balance......the blind rage that the poison of duality has caused......is agonizing ....the role that she wanted me to play...if continued would lead to annihilation....I need to give up......

The only thing I surrender to......the mother of all thoughts and words......silence....only she can chain my chaotic nature.....unbounded I may cause chaos.....unfettered I may cause harm to the very balance......

I can hear my children s cries......they don't want me to recede......but for the welfare of all.....I need to be strong......As I recede.......thoughts have to be given up......My own thoughts....each capable of bringing disolution if brought to action....I need to be careful.......the powerful ones emerge......

Sati.....you always knew......that the agony of separation would be my lot.....only I....Rudra could bear it......before I could stop you.....you gave up your identity.....

Didn't you realize , I would stop without you.....it was you who pulled me out of my meditations.......you robed me with your own characteristics......lending nature to me...Shiva.....who is attributeless.....I embraced imperfection on your insistence.....your disappearance has endorsed my own dictum......Finally everything is transitory......All matter has to return to its source......
So be it...."Tathaastu"

Raavana.....my brave warrior-son......he knew nothing but me.......forced by his prarabdha to be ram's polar.....his destiny was already sealed.........Though as mighty as Indra.....as learned as brihaspati......he knew the world will always remember him for his so called evil deeds.......who else but I could sooth his troubled mind....

As destiny wrought each evil deed by his hands......he clung more and more to me......how could I forsake him....cursed with immortality by brahma....I had to help him.....I decided to hasten his end...

..Give him release before he could be subjected to further humiliations.....I told Rama the secret to finish him.......protected him in the guise of hanuman......

Ravana could never be defeated by might alone.....he was my devotee......On the eve before the final battle......he himself told me to finish the play....reveal the secret of his immortality to Rama......

I was elated......no more would he be subject to the machinations of the world.....let the fools believe that he died of pride.....he finally attained my state.....I never forsake my children.....

A part of me wants to stop ......who will care for my children....the bhutas and the pisachas......in me they find the perfect father.....whoever it may be....however repulsive....to me they are all expressions of the universal truth......
My auspiciousness soothes them....without me they will be lost....in the whirlpool of Karma.....

Who could I complain to.....I am shiva......the destroyer of sorrow and confusion.....how can I myself be subject to my own play......

I give up....let the other gods lift the mantle that I have been carrying since ages......

Without Sati....no more do I find the need to be responsible to anyone........
I am He.....
Shivohum

I know.....its pretty cheesy....but hey its my blog :D

The passion of "Chris"na

2010-06-14T09:26:00.000-07:00

Aloha phrends.....
A warning , today my inspiration is mis-guiding me to write something really cheesy and sentimental....kindly bear with me....as a writer has to explore all the shades of his art.....to make himself feel complete .....or that's what we say ...when we lack ideas and plagiarize somebody Else's work :P

This blog is actually inspired by a book that I read sneakily during my office lunch hours....
without further ado...

Krishna----the blue-hued lord.....much worshiped ....the one who bears the ire of the intellectuals and the vedantins alike...I personally belong to the school of advaita....and hence my experience with this particular deity has been minimal....but Krishna always has been depicted as a personality with so many hues, that sometimes it seems as if different people are talking about different personalities at the same time......a teasing lover , brilliant strategist and statesman, a guide to the uninspired.....

Lets say per se....Krishna was not a deity...maybe he was just a God fully aware of his mortality......what would have gone through his mind during the last few hours before he died....

Scene:
I stood staring at the sea...the source of all creation......I had watched it all begin here.....and to what purpose .......every man , a symbol of perfection who I watched grow under my personal care......today I stand alone offering "arghya" into the waters for their departed souls, whose very death I orchestrated.....

Gandhari has cursed me and my clan to a gruesome fate......I have accepted her judgement with a calm resignation.....every living thing has to live out its prarabdha karma.....be it animal, man or god incarnate....being bonded to the flesh, its pains have to be borne with patience and fortitude.....

Yes that has been my karma (destiny)......to pit brother against brother.....to provide man with the ideal, that nothing is greater than one's duty towards evolution.......towards the entire humanity......

How I wish, I had not been chosen for this......worshiped by yajnaseni (drauopadi), parth (arjun)..I had to protect him from Karna......I feel the weight of Karna's death on my hands......he who destiny had marked out to torture.....how could I not acknowledge that hero when he lived... I....the lord of All.....not understand the agony he went through....not knowing his own lineage.....misled at every turn by both his destiny and me......he had no chance.......

He knew me.......the day he set eyes on me...he knew ...I was the alpha and omega.....He knew that the people whom I support will have no defeat......he saw it the day I met him to disclose his identity....he saw what I could give him....."moksha" from the eternal transmigration that each soul is subject to.......HE surrendered himself to me that day......The bow was taut....the arrows flew....but Karna the mind had already surrendered at my feet......he was just finishing his karma (destiny)

His devotion to me was unsurpassable....though outwardly against me.....he even surrendered his "Kavacha -kundala" knowing fully well that it was I.....his protector who instigated Indra to make him devoid of his armor.....
such devotion....Arjuna will never understand.....truly Karna was "Daanveer"......finally he gave his own self to me......

How I wish I could have been on his side ...been his charioteer....imparted the "Gita" to him.......a man who was ready for the final flight of the soul......but his destiny would not allow me to do that.....forgive me Karna......O son of Surya.....verily you have attained my abode , by going beyond the Maya I created....ever aware of the world of duality, you surrendered yourself to me while fighting me....making me a helpless lord who is awed by the erudition of his disciple.....

Forgive me Parth.....I always knew you loved Draupadi the most, and could not bear her being shared by your brothers....Being a friend ,I knew your mind and I should have helped you......but again I orchestrated her marriage to all of you...as I had to ensure that the Pandavas always remained five.....for I could foresee that it was draupadi who was the common thread, as a string is through a set of pearls.....
without her each one of you would have gone your separate way....and then who would have protected the "dharma" (way of life)......

Her eyes haunt me.......she thinks of me as her own blood ......but what could I do...I had to bring about the game of dice where she had to be humiliated in front of everyone forging the bond between you five brothers......the final nail on the coffin of the Kauravas....
Forgive me yajnaseni.....I had to betray your trust.....for the gretear good....I could have burnt those sinners to cinder within the twinkling of the eye.....but I had to establish dharma.....the protocol had to be established.......

Though bound to the Pandavas.....your mind already was merged in me......Only you could go through all the torture that I put you through and still love me as the Lord.....for your love had no duality in it......it just accepted me as I was.....where people saw "Krishna " -the mayavi......you alone saw reason behind my actions.....
The day I met you and your husbands in the forest in the last year of your exile......and encouraged them to fight Duryodhana....I could see the flicker of pain in your eyes....you knew....that your lord has been using you as an instrument to abolish "adharma"....to bring to justice those who had sinned and at that moment you gave yourself up completely to me......Your husbands will never understand your love for me......A love which knew only the higher good.....which does not even have a tinge of greed in it but flows just because it enjoys in enveloping even the undeserving......You always reminded me of my mother Yashoda......
If ever I am born again....I would be born as your son....for no greater fortune can I think for myself....

Today as Jara (hunter who killed krishna)....prepares the arrow which will finish my incarnation....I remember you the most......I am tired......
I still remember the day when I came to protect you from the wrath of durvasa.....the akshaya patra had been cleansed and would yield no more food.....I ate a grain and the entire assembly of sages went home satiated....

I just want to eat the last morsel of food from your hands....but how dare I show my face to you.....because of me , you mourn the death of your sons in the battle of kurukshetra......
Maybe in the next lifetime........

The pawn "continued"

2010-06-11T08:28:00.000-07:00

Though I was planning to complete this misogynist monologue today night......the indian I.T company I slog for has been very understanding and has adopted me as angelina jolie adopts another third world child...:P
They strictly believe in not giving me work, else I may strain myself....so I, conscientious workaholic that I am , have decided to utilize this brilliant time to poke fun at my female colleagues....

d) The "Pied Piper"
This one seems harmless but is one of the smartest mammal around. This breed comes in various flavours. By consistently fending off "chivalrous" male attention this is the creed which invented "If you don't know me don't add me in orkut/facebook" tag
At the age of 15 or so they develop a poise which we hardy males learn somewhere when we are doddering past 70.
The back-offs and the "get a life" lines are so subtly hidden behind well crafted sniggers that even someone as smart as the author has to think twice :P
Now for the title.....this breed always belives in surrounding itself with a protective ring of "bhaiyas" who ironically themselves don't know that they are unhired sepoys :P
Such is the cunning devilry that unsuspecting fellow engineers end up offering the "watchman" services of their own.....:P....moronically believing in awe that they are the "chosen ones" friend :P
And if any of my readers suddenly felt a cold wave of self directed symmpathy, the author would like some part of it ...as even I have danced to the tune of the "piper":P
A mild variation of this type is also interesting.
This new creature is a hedonistic fashionista.....known popularly as the "Jalwa Queen"...inspired by the movie "Fashion".....
Extremely oblivious to the surrounding dog-eat-dog world("duniya kutti hai", for the puritan) , this creature revels in its own beauty.
Neither power, glory nor fame, the very idea that she is better dressed than her kaamwali bai is enough to send this lass above the moon.
Dead-end jobs, pathetic educational curriculum , existential angst, maddening attempts to escape monotony, what-cartoon-to-watch, which-heroines-screensaver-to-download ...all these are the crosses we buckle under ,fellow male engineers.....not for her.....just the fact that Loreal has manufactured a new hairspray which can change her hair color everyday is enough to propel her to rapturous ecstasy...
Normally this creature manages to ensnare 2 or 3 hapless fellow engineers (typically it has been observed that she has a fatal attraction for "bihari bitwaas" ) who pay their daily homage by dropping her off at her house and in general agreeing with everything that she has to make a comment on.......in effect the lives of these hapless beings are ruined , as no girl will look at them for being so spineless and the hapless male-engineering population is ground beneath 5-inch high pointed soles of the "jalwa queen"....

e) the "LBW" (Laambun bari waatli)
Imagine stranded in an arid deset without water for 45 days....and suddenly you see an oasis beckoning enticingly, it holds vague promises and endears to the thirst within......and then poof!!!....nothing.... it was a mirage....:(.....such are the dastardly deeds of destiny...
The LBW is a cunning creature which through certain subtle arrangement of the dress and hair attempts a complete makeover within 200 Rs., which makes her look like a million bucks from afar.....
The already parched male-engineer , who is like the proverbial wolf with puckered lips screaming "yaooooooooza", gasps in surprise at the newly turned out model....but it's a dying hope....on close observation, the charm dies...finito.....it's the sea of sand again....

It is understood that the makeover is for her own dying self-esteem, but this creature is inadvertently the most ruthless of all...as she gives us hope ...and then dashes it into smithereens....
Beware fellow mates...she will take you down...from afar....

f) The "housewife"
I have a definite dislike for this one...:P.....These creatures never play it fair and square...though they speak about women's liberation and the importance of career for the working woman......and will always act as if they have to fight the big bad cruel misogynist world....the moment we start competing with them , they will marry Mr.Moneybags and have the last laugh......
Do they comprehend , how difficult it is , for our fragile egos to even stand in front of Mr.Moneybags....:P....obviously for them money was never a factor ....they just "connected" ....it was never money pshaw!!!.....how dare we even think of such crudity.....twice they met at the local "CCD" (after they both checked out each others resume and bank balance)...and they just knew it....
You and I ...my friend ....we are crass people.....we need time to judge,understand and sync with people...not so for them.....for they were just "meant to be"...

The circus doesn't stop at this.....ideally my friend, when life stops making sense, we change course, try to pursue new challenges to know our own limitations and strengths... ....WRONG!!!....you want change....just get married and scoff at the poor hapless engineer guy as if he is missing out on something...:P...act as if marriage is the answer to all of life's quibbles....
ya.....misguide the poor chap...who already is miserable that he has not yet got laid.....:P...
(Actually lot of my anger comes from the fact that all others are getting sex under some pretext or other and I never get any :P).....

Since I need to attend one such wedding tomoroow...i have to go give my kurta for ironing...:P
(to be continued)

The "pawn"

2010-06-09T17:30:00.000-07:00

Though I would have liked to give the title as "the spawn" , making it sound like some sleazy exorcist kinda movie, I refrain as this will not be doing justice to the subject under discussion....

If you are an engineer and its been your good fortune to work in an I.T company, then my dear reader you will appreciate my discussion better
The general feeling when the newbie joins an I.T company is very similar to "papa kehte hain bada naam karega".....the novice believes that he will revolutionise the working of the I.T sector....tch tch....such naivety....its actually awe inspiring when I look at it in retrospect...:P

Slowly but steadily "papa kehte hain" transforms into a guttural and nasal soundtrack by "aapdo himesh reshamiya"......slow, painful and never ending ...P

During these testing times.....the novice always has a feeling of impending doom looming over him...which lifts only when the clock strikes the twilight hour of 6:30.....any one who has been working in an I.T company ...would appreciate it when I say that we very much resemble the wilder beasts in the grassy plains of Savannah when chased by a pack of ferocious leopards.....as the clock strikes 6:30....

But on some days nature triumphs, as the Project lead threateningly lurks in the sidelines , lunging at our tender necks just when liberation is at hand i.e. the worst pain that any software engineer could endure..."This weekend due to stringent deadlines, you are requested to attend the office"....
what madness.....!!!!

On such weekends you can actually have a glimpse of the undead when the novice trudges his weary legs towards "mordor" where the dark screen of cobol looms.....where even "gandalf the white" comes dressed in sober gray....:P..

But hope still shines in the form of the "Rings"...which we form with fellow engineers....as practically none of us have any life outside the office...the bond of fellowship forged is unbreakable....If jai and veeru had been software engineers they would have happily married each other instead of mooning away and wasting their lives for jaya bachan and hemamlini...:P

what with our brilliant training in cobol and SQL..we are definitely a catch ...any red blooded female will fall for us when we describe in gruesome detail how we told the Project lead off by rebelliously not going to the office on weekends....the fact that we sat trembling , thinking of how he would pick the flesh off our bones....and how we try to overcome sheer terror by watching b-grade movies of mithun-da just to kill time......we never tell...girls don't need to know all the details....it's just the main points that needs to be covered.....:P

Maybe it is something in our brains that makes us feel cool and important as we chase minor victories of taking unannounced leaves as yardsticks of bravery and courage....

Not to say anything about the female population who darken the corridirs of I.T company...:P
the male population of I.T companies are all the same...we tend to behave the same way in any I.T company...simple-minded creatures....that's what we are...a good canteen in the ground floor and an elvin-looking HR representative is all that we ask for...

But the female population is one intersting subject...in my years of experience I an classify them into varoious sub-sects or cults ...if I may....

a)stuffy know-it-all who doesn't actually know anything
this one is actually petty harmless....but these chicks will always make you feel guilty about your own irresponsible behaviour of god-given work....how dare you not take the coding/testing/maintenance work seriously???
The purpose of life is to be stuffy, uptight and in general spread an aura of self-importance :P....they represent the stern elderly aunt who always spanked you when you made yourself sick at parties by eating too much samosa....
Stay away from these chicks fellow mates.....though the exterior maybe pleasing to the eye....do you really want to spend the rest of your life governed by a stern aunt who will not tolerate flighty foolishness ..:P

b) The ass-kisser
before you start getting ideas...this is one of the nastiest breeds that pollute mother earth....
Mainly the modus operandi is to first hunt for a sugar-daddy who would faintly resemble a mother eagle who viciously protects her little ones....
Destiny, luck, misfortune ..this is common to our ilk fellow men....these are unknown to the ass-kisser......
lady luck constantly accompanies her to on site countries ....and bad luck dare not touch her from fear of the bald/old/horny eagle
An irritatingly condescending attitude also is the AK's (ass kisser) constant companion, which reaches its pinnacle when the "rating" session begins.....
I know fellow men...I could see you wince as I wrote the words.....but life is harsh for you and me comrade..:P.....for without an over sized chest and a bootilicous behind , what else does the harsh world appreciate :P....

Since you and I are not so adept at this art which the AK practices with consummate ease.....we have to put up with raving reviews of how their work has been appreciated by all and sundry...and how indispensable they are to the general health of the company....I really understand and appreciate that....many of my friends really don't care for the company they work for...it is refreshing to see someone who so genuinely feels for the company they work for.....as one of my friends would say "pearly drop of tears" were shed by me on hearing this

Just smile and wave boys...smile and wave....this too shall pass.....

3)The huntress:
this one is also relatively harmless......she resembles the young starlet who is torn between the casting couch and the idealistic,unrealistic way of working her way to the top....

A close friend of the AK ....she nevertheless holds her own .....though sugar daddies have been part of her life too......it has been more of a step-fatherly treatment that she has been on the receiving end of....

Torn between loyalty to the AK and her own inadequacy, the huntress unleashes a powerful whiplash on....you guessed it right ...on the already down trodden male -engeering poulation....its their lot to suffer and they bow humbly before the almighty destruction that the huntress unleashes.....

Ruthlessly judgemental, she does what psychologists do to their patients....make them more miserable....
But I still like this type.....this category means no harm.....she is the female version of Sunny deol....except that instead of the "dhai" kilo ka haat ....it's the "teekhi zaban" that does the damage.....
she has no aim no mission (dialogue lifted from one of sunny paajis flick's , circa 1989), she knows only mayhem.....

4)the cracker a.k.a phataka
No....again you misread the title......phataka as in which when bursts beneath your feet...causess surprise, fear and anger and not exactly in that order.......
again a close colleague of the AK.....she too hides her diffidence by coyly biting of peoples head off when they are getting above themselves....

she is miserable and if you are not....then you had it my friend....she likes misery so much ...sometimes she manufactures it.....and yet again the raw material for the factory is provided by the oft-trodden, much abused male population....
Main difference between the phataka and the huntress is the frequency of attacks....the huntress is systematic and calculating....she waits for the right moment and finishes her prey with one swift stroke.... the phataka does not have the finesse of the huntress.....she explodes when something triggers her fuse....

her unpredictabiliy is her forte....what would you prefer, a death which is swift and clean or a dose of sulphur when you are least expectng it....

personally i prefer the huntress....atleast she gives me time as I calmly resign to my fate....

(to be continued)

2010-04-27T07:58:00.000-07:00

In the last few months,the corporate sector in Mumbai is having a pretty good time.
Whenever there is a dull moment in the office, out they bring my reume and read the balderdash that I have enlisted under the guise of experience......

It comes across as a very shy resume which doesn't want to put out on the first date :P......It slowly draws out the reader making him feel there is more to come and finally dies a sudden death....
Going through it, a thought crossed my mind, as they often do and I realised, what would fate be dishing out to somene who has a distinct disadvantage compared to me...like say a thief...what if such a man decides to join the crime syndicate and decides to submit his resume for due consideration....

What is the procedure.......or should I say Modus operandi??.....do job portals post openings for such jobs.....
I can even imagine the flyers that would be on display
"Wanted .....thief with excellent sleight of hand.....and communication skills (in case he wants to talk his way out of a tight spot)
At least 3 years of work experience in safe-blowing, money-laundering and rooftop-climbing. Preferably should have at least a dozen aliases and should be a master of disguises"
Interested hooligans can contact Miss so and so....at this particular address...."
Lets say our hero or villain ...lets call him Fishy Sam for the sake of convenience....decides to give his luck a chance ....happens to go to the interview..
What would be the conversation like....
An AL-Capone like figure sits on the chair chewing his cigar with his eyes boring into the very soul of the candidates.....
Lets call him The big boss...
Boss: Hello....have a seat..Mr...sam
S: good evening sir...nice hat you have there...I daresay its your own??? No??....
B: So whatchya been doing for the past few years sammy.....any big heists under your belt???
S: Well...I have not been into heisting as much as I have been into pick pocketing....
I mean , I do have long term goals ....but a man has got to eat...and picking pockets is something that I have always wanted to do....
Leaving aside the money....the look of dumb surprise when the chum goes through his pocket trying to find where he kept his bag of doubloons......is worth the effort....
Its the satisfaction of a job well done......that matters....
B:Hmmm....So why do want to leave it now....why the interest in joining the syndicate....???...Have people become more wary....have they started wearing their money closer to their skins.???
S: Actually I am planning to settle......she is a safe-blower form downtown____ place....Looking at her you would never guess that she raids peoples houses at night and still maintains that school girl complexion of hers....
..I fell like I should have a little woman waiting for me at the old homestead when I bring in my loot for the day.......and though going through peoples pockets is good enough for me...I doubt whether it will satisfy the little woman.....
She is a tough cookie , that one.....she told me the other day that unless I get a reward of 20000$ tagged to my name , the wedding bells wont ring out..."
B:...Hmmm.....I see .....I still don't get why you urchins get hitched so early these days...In our days unless we had an assault robbery or atleast a couple of years behind bars...we did not contemplate matrimony...In any case ..I think prison prepares you for the holy state......
Well ..I think we may have something for you on the block...I hope you don't mind working in shifts.....and I hope you don't mind working in groups....I mean it makes the job all the more easier if you have an inside stand....
S: Not an issue sir....I will be quick to learn on the job...and will do you proud...In fact I will be so good that within a year all major security companies will start patenting new designs for locks and will start recruiting heavy weight wrestlers as security guards....
B: well sammy.....Congratulations ....you get the job.....and let me warn as one married man to another....there will be days when you will prefer to be in a cell with 4 guys you haven't had a decent shower in days to the company of your little woman as you call her.....
But all in due time friend...all in due time"

ganpatipule......

2010-04-26T19:03:00.000-07:00

For the "freaks of nature"
Are you the kind ,who prefers solitude and revels in the beatitude of nature instead of shaking a leg to the mambo beats of a DJ in a sweaty club.....
Maybe it is the healing silence that unwinds you, contrary to what your friends may say....
If you want to shake off the monotony that threatens to engulf you and want to have some "Me-time" then Ganpatipule (Maharashtra) provides the perfect retreat for you.
One of the virgin beaches that Maharashtra is famous for....its still largely undiscovered by tourists who still prefer Goa(ho-hum).....
Located in the district of Ratnagiri on the Konkan coast of Maharashtra, its easily accessible by road and rail.

For the "penny-pincher"
Ratnagiri being the nearest major station , state transport buses provide cheap and comfortable commute to Ganpatipule....S.T. buses start from mumbai in the night and reach ganpatipule in the morning, covering a distance of around 375 kms.
Adjacent to the beach is the MTDC (Maharashtra Tourism Development Corporation) which provide a good view of the beach..... recommended if you are travelling with spouse/kids....
But if you are at the beautiful age when such encumbrances don't limit you i.e.you are a student / bachelor then I empathize and maybe you should check out the local lodges. They charge around Rs 500-700 a day and you can roam around like a gypsy without worrying about some urchin pilfering through your luggage...
The rooms provided are clean and can be adjusted to accommodate 4 people.That comes to around Rs.100-150 per head.

"Main attraction"
The main attraction is obviously the clean , pristine beach.You can actually see through the ocean water which is great considering majority of the beaches in Maharashtra have been turned murky, courtesy indisciplined tourists....
The best part is, most of the people visit ganpatipule mainly for the temple and not for the beach, giving the beach a "private-beach" kind of feel.
There are no shady guys in trunks trying to sell water sports ...... hence you are spared the agony of dodging them and finding a quiet spot......
Also it's a veritable gold mine for amateur photograph buffs because of its scenic location and beautifully constructed temple.
Flanked on one side by the beach, the temple is surrounded by a hill on the remaining three sides.In fact thetemple is constructed at the foot of the hill around the deity.
Red stones used in its construction give it a distinct "rajasthani" flavour.
The walls have ornate carvings of "Dwar-palakas" (temple-gate guardians) and the presiding deity (Ganapati) in various artistic postures , symbolizing the deity's mastery over the finer forms of art.

The main deity itself is small, about 4-4 1/2 feet in height , vaguely resembling the deity with a trunk and eyes.
Devout's throng the temple throughout the day, paying obeisance to the deity who is considered all the more potent because its a swayambhu (self-made, literally swayam -self , bhu -earth)
Swayambhus are considered auspicious as it is believed that the deity incarnates at those places out of its own volition.
Legend has it that the deity was discovered when a cowherd followed his cow to the hills and found her worshiping the deity with milk from her udders.
On closer examination, the deity was revealed and a temple constructed around it.
A pradakshina around the temple is considered auspicious , symbolizing that God is the centre and we have to keep revolving in the material plane with our thoughts firmly fixed on the centre.
In any case the pradakshina is recommended, as the hill is breathtakingly beautiful especially in the rainy season.The pradakshina leads one to another swayambhu on the upper parts of the hill.
Though not elaborate as the original deity, this swaymabhu represents the face of the deity.
Regular worship is done at this particular spot too.

For the "foodie"
Food is definitely not a problem in Ganapatipule.Closer to the temple , we can find a string of good hotels offering superb malvani/konkan fare.
If you are a gourmet , try out the konkan cuisine......also there is something about the food over there ,You don't feel satiated by the food at all.......a good point if you are planning to try everything on the menu.
I would definitely recommend the "Sol-kadi" , a concoction of kokam and coconut milk, which is supposed to be an appetizer.
The charges are nominal and the total expenditure would not exceed Rs. 200 per person.

"Nearby tourist attraction"
Around 2 kms from Ganpatipule is Malgund, birthplace of the famous marathi poet "keshavsoot"
Jaigad fort is also a definite must-see.

All in all a brilliant get away for the weekend, which would help you rejuvenate both body and soul.

The book of Job

2010-04-01T23:38:00.000-07:00

Hallelujah people....
Gosh...It's been ages ain't it......well to be frank its been really a long time since my brow shone with honest sweat....Officially I have been languishing on my plush sofa for five months now....
Golly...things are relative aren't they.....these five months just flew by....and it is not as if I don't want to put my nose to the grindstone...I mean just the other day I had gone to an interview , which lasted for around 15 minutes.....
It would be not wrong to say that the interviewer was plainly not ready to buy my story of giving a shot at technical writing....She was plainly seen pursing her lips and saying to herself, "what has come over kids these days.....He is a developer of software and what bally cheek to try out for technical writing....."
My understanding however had been " how difficult can it be.......I have technical knowledge and I have been told that I write passably....."
Not even my french cut(I refer to the fungal growth on my face here) impressed her.....
After this I was escorted to a room wherein I was told to write a manual to help rural people toast their bread into a crisp browny finish.....
Its a theory.... that more intelligent the person the more irrelevant questions fire through the cerebellum when a seemingly important task is at hand....
Well....As you will soon see...I was no exception :P......
Firstly.....why toast??...If I am not wrong the staple diet of farmers has never been bread.....it has always been the Indian substitute of bread that they prefer....
As far as I know village folks are smart and not specific of the urban niceties ....I will never be able to convince him (the villager) that keeping aside the "roti" he should opt for the more anglicized version version of it.....
He would laugh on my face or at least spit on the side and look askance at me.....
Coming back to the test....if we cant convince our target customer as to the utility of the product itself.....how can we impose the user manual on him.....
Sort of like giving the jack of spades to the player who obviously had made it plain through his secretive signals that ,it is the ace of hearts that his heart coveteth....(kinda neat eh?)
In spite of such genuine issues being unaddressed....I put my shoulder to the wheel.....and rambled on about how to plug the wire to the mains without hurting oneself.....made me feel real silly.:P...
As the document proceeded, I tried to assume an apologetic overtone, sort of to say "Rural guy...I am really sorry to write this bilge as if you don't know a thing about electricity....but if its any consolation , I have full respect for your mental capabilities and just in case this manual finds its way into your hands , I wash away all responsibilities and would like to point an accusing finger towards the corporate bosses who made me write this"
I finished the test with an editing process , which made my head hurt even more than I thought it could .....it was about the relationship between a heat exchanger and a mechanic who operates it.....
apparently the heat exchanger had a nasty way of throwing in the towel at the most inopportune moment(like all women :P)
and it was the duty of the mechanic to pacify it with cooling mixtures and a complete overhaul (spiritual equivalent to the roses-and-chocolate sequence employed by a smitten lover)
Well after all this brouhaha, i was told to wait and put my faith on stars :P .......
Well for now I just hope that even if i get the job.....they would give me something fun to write ....like writing an operating manual for nail polish remover to be used by the natives of Zambia...:P......

Lets spice it up

2010-03-13T04:08:00.000-08:00

Morning folks......
"There comes a point in every man's life"....nope too cliched......
How do I start.......what would make the editor of chillibreeze sit up , keep his/her cigar aside and exclaim in joyous exuberance that they have hit gold finally.....

Maybe an article about contemporary Indian politics.......but what if the writer(i.e me) is unaware of that......Though making sarcastic comments on politicians and provoking the common man by giving him wild conspiracy theories to discuss over the evening tea is every writers dream.....I don't have the necessary raw material to poke fun at politicians....

What else now.....Maybe the market is hungry only for serious writers....one who wears horn-rimmed glasses....has a few strands of hair on his head bearing testimony to the harsh life that accompanies every literary pursuit......and the one who writes about things that matter....

But what about light comic relief........Though some may believe the market is less inclined towards it... ....all of us can do with a good laugh....
Consider this Mr/Mrs/Ms.Editor.....you are ploughing through scores of literature......ranging from a report showing the population explosion in Assam to the articles by young fashionistas of wannabe Milan ......

You assimilate,absorb and decide who is worthy enough to fill the pages of chilibreeze with their spicy additions.....but consider this ...NOBODY...I repeat.... nobody.... attempts an article about writing to the editor the importance of priniting an article that I guess speaks about "nothing".......

"Nothing" in the sense that though it pretends to be article it falls shy of it by being non-committal about its objective, it neither preaches nor scorns at the preacher.It just is.....existing for the sole purpose of providing literary satisfaction to its creator and to provide a moment of comic interlude to the hard working intelligentsia who otherwise are involved in things that makes them look comic.....

Weird as it may sound ....I did not find these genre....it found me....however hard I may try....its practically impossible for me to take up anything seriously other than writing comic anecdotes.....

You will better understand my position when I describe the phases in my literary career.....Initially I thought I would write a novel which would create a light,breezy ...humorous utopia for all the hardworking folks who really don't feel like worrying about global issues once they have returned from their corporate slave-house ......

I though it would be easy...so after returning home from my corporate slave-house...I sat down with the serious intent of writing a humorous novel...something akin to a P.G.Wodehouse or a Jerome.K.Jerome...
But then I realised what is a good story withput the blood chilling murders , the mysterious oriental daggers and the good ol' sex motifs......

So finally my wannabe humorous , light,breezy novel changed course and assumed a frightening,spine chilling,suspense novel with a hero who relied basicaly on wisecracks to cover his shortcomings....(please dont draw parrallels here between the writer and the hero)....

The point here is the grossly misunderstood, neglected genre of "Nonsensical humour" has lost its existence among a sea of grossly overrated serious novels.....

So by accepting my article you will not only be saving the writer of a dying clan....but also give a shot in the arm to a dying "genre" itself.......

P.S: I hope this article serves as a resume for me as well...as I genuinely know nothing about any topic in detail.....but can turn my hands to anything...as I love variety and the superficial knowledge of weird/vague branches of science......something which inspires me to write .......

The divine comedy (cont)---Not Dante's

2010-02-20T02:30:00.000-08:00

Scene 3 :
Location :Hiranyagarbha (Brahmas world)
Both shiva and vishnu enter the smoke/mist filled home of brahma.....
S: Less on the smoke dude......do you want us to choke?
B: Wassup guys........Long time no see.......some new demon on the block trying to usurp heaven....?? and by the way that's not smoke ....its heavenly mist.....
V: Sooooooo.........hows the creation thing coming along.......any new prototype in the offing ? or is it just the same old homosapien.....
B: Nah....cant create new ones.....not allowed to do that till the end of this eon.......you know I am really tired of creating the same set of people again and again.....and nowadays these guys don't even have wars .......they have become really peace seeking individuals.......kinda surprising.......I never thought these guys would settle for peace....
V: I think your prayers have been answered......apparently humanity is torn by strife and there is a great seeking among them for God.....so are you up to it......
B : (with all 3 faces opened in surprise) : Hey ....I am not the one in charge of housekeeping that's your job profile......I don't know how to incarnate.....am too old for that....and besides you have done it 9 times already....you know all the gimmicks......or else tell shiva to jump the gun......all he does is dance and demolish....why not help someone for a change .....it wouldn't hurt him.....!!
V: Chill Brahms.......we were just pulling your leg......None of us are going to go down.....we had a general body meting the other day...and we decided that's its too risky to go down.......even for me....people nowadays question faith and pretty much don't buy crappy philosophy.....
Nowadays people work for the fruits ......not for the work per se......
S:obviously dude.....nobody likes to work....its always the reward that matters.......I am really surprised it lasted this long....
V: Ya.....they had to know about it some time or the other....

Enter saraswathi......(Brahmas consort)
Sa: Hey guys.....my my .....the trinity at one place???....either its a demon or there has been an SOS from earth ??
S: Not exactly....people really need us....but none of us wants to go down......its really risky below...
You visit these earth guys a lot......how do they seem to you......
Sa: Hey ....I handle only the young crowd....My crowd is mostly students.........even with them its one hell of a job....The other day a software engineer was trying to invoke my grace for a computer exam....I mean how can I help??...has he not seen my profile...I myself have taken to a soft art like veena......what would I know about computer science........??
V:So what did you do???
Sa: What else..I told him to prepare or at least tell the guy in front of him to prepare......
S: Hehehe....nice.......so you are he goddess of all kinds of crafts....cheating too.......
Sa: Maybe....but I would definitely not put that on my resume.......

V :Hey ....talking of resumes....why not go below as unemployed youths and try to understand why these guys are pissed at us......Maybe we are missing something.....We can be incognito and actually nobody needs to know we are god........
B: Ya that sounds nice....Even I need a break........
S: OK so its decided....the coming week we descend on earth incognito to find out whats eating people......
Till then I am going to go over to kailash and finish the remaining marijuana....you guys coming???
V & B: U betcha
(To be cont)

THe divine comedy

2010-02-05T03:16:00.000-08:00

Morning .....
Today my children...we will try to interpret why people are the way they are......confused....bewildered...searching for things which they themselves know are unattainable.......Maybe somebody rigged the system......Maybe just maybe we should take a closer look at our divine parents....
Scene : Kailash
Main characters:
Shiva : God of auspiciousness
Parvati :Spouse of shiva
Scene 1:
Parvati (P) : My lord.......whats up with you??....Its been 3 days since you opened your eyes......is it the hashish you smoked at Indra's party the other night......??
Shiva (S): Paro......how many times have i told you ..dont refer to me as "lord".....I feel like a pompous buffoon.......actually I was deeply contemplating whether I liked hashish or chillum....or are they the same ??....Its difficult to remember things once you are high.....
P : Forgive me Lord.....oops....darling......you know how concerned I am about you.....Its really awkward when the man of the house goes on rave parties and comes back clothed in tiger skin.....by the way where did you get them.....they feel so great....
S : Its a present...from one of my devotees......But have to be careful.....Apparently tiger is an endangered species...and you never know when we might get into trouble........Keep it in the closet will you alongwith the hashish....I think I need to take it slow......
P : Yup even I think so......By the way how is the preparation for the Great divine dance competition coming along.......I think you will go for your trademark "Tandav"....
S: Nope ..I think people dont appreciate classical dancing any more......I hate those Shiamak davars classes.....There is no competition with those guys......the way they gyrate I think I must have put in India rubber instead of a spinal cord......
P : Oh dont say so....peope really like it when you do your gig.......
S: Pshaw!!!.....dont patronize me Paro.....Earlier the devotees used to fawn over me....whatever I did was aped and people hung on my every word.....But now.......they have become smarter......
P : How can you say??
S: You just have to talk to them to know it......There is this new fad of questioning everything that I say.....Sometimes I am sober but most of the time it is the hashish that does the talking...I can't give reasons for that.......
P :Yup they are finally realising that they hold the key to their own destinies.....
S: Hmmmm.......They have defined pretty much everything.....just hope hey dont interpret us.......that would be the day....Imagine if they realise that we are just like them......No temples...No sycophantic worship....worst of all no recognition.....
P : You know what.... you should go to my Bro....Vishnu...He must have something up his yellow coloured sleeve...
S : Ya.....He is the most cunning of all of us.......Maybe he is waiting for one of us to goto him....so that once again his supremacy among us could be established......
P : Dont be jealous....just talk to him......maybe he has a plan....

Scene 2 :Ksheer sagar
Vishnu is in "Yog nidra"......Lakshmi is not at his side......Apparently Sensex dropped by a few points creating a furore in mumbai.....and she had to leave urgently to be at her devotees side......

S : Hey champ......whats new??......
V : Nothing much .....Iam bored man...nothing to do....and this serpent is becoming old......you dont know how annoying it is when somebody hisses in your ear when having a conversation
S :Tell me about it......even mine doesnt allow me a minute of peace.....so hows the time looking for a new incarnation ??
V: Not again.......I have gone down 9 times..and each time these guys made religions out of it......And that too contradictoy to each other.......I never did or said all those things that they claim to be my doing.......
S :Like.......?
V :Take the Gita....do you think any man in a proper frame of mind would sing a 1000 page long book in the middle of the battefield.......
S :Gosh....what was the conersation about then???
V : Oh that...Arjun was having some domestic problems....his wife was complaning about his habit of getting married in every kingdom he visits...As a friend I was just giving him some pointers......
S : Ya .....you would know...:P....you rogue.....How did you do it.....I mean manage 16000 wives....
V : Its easy you tell each one of them that they look divinely beautiful than the other and you actually admire her the most.......nothing much to it....
S : You are smart arent you??...I came here asking you when you were going to incarnate and you havent answered it yet.....so ...whats your answer.....?
V : I dont know man....Do they really need us to guide them.....I dont think we can monopolise peoples attention any longer........chuck it .......I think we should appoint a commitee to give us regular reports .....just to monitor them
S: you sure......No more chanting your name???...I know you like it...:
V: I will survive........But just for the heck of it....lets just go and scare the heaven out of brahma.......Its fun when all his three faces register fear at the same time....quite a sight...
S: Sure.......Iam game......

To be continued.....

The perfect job.......

2010-01-07T21:04:00.000-08:00

greetings ...children of light........
Today instead of preending to be the insufferable know-it-all .....I would humbly bow to you people.....as I am really in need and am searching for a job.......
The malady is becoming more severe as I see the garbage man and the household help looking at me enviously when they see me loungng in my bed......kinda makes them feel dirty about themselves....:P
Also evading the all powerful question as to "what are you doing nowadays"...is becoming very difficult to avoid.......If Iam unsuccesful in dodging my well wishers.....:P..I normally start with my grand plans.......its just a matter of perspective.......dont judge me for being unemployed......appreciate my grand plans and feel miseable that your life is not so exciting.....
Even if iam not having fun ...Iam sure as hell not going to let anyone know that their life is better than mine....:P
Maybe we should name this phase........will give it a sophisticated feel.....like "megalomaniaoptimusdepresso"...in the future when some hapless creature tries a stint with unemployment.....maybe he will just need to say this....and voila the other person doesnt need any other explanation.......
Now if you have a mind I would beg you to throw it in the future and imagine this ...
Sene 1 : Aunty A meets Aunty B.......Aunty A being a snob rubs in the face of aunty B that her son earns a cool packet and out of altristic concern she wants to know what Aunty B's son is upto...:P.....
Normally Aunty B would have to really get down to it and justify her sons laziness to corporate greed and software industry in general......but you have a cool phrase like "megalomaniaoptimusdepresso" and she is done......
Also I feel the onus of establishing the credibiliy of the phase lies on me....If youngsters have someone to look foward to ...It would make it all the more easier to chuck your job and enjoy a life without competition......so I humbly request that my faithful fans should stop asking me as to what Iam doing and focus on what Iam going to do .....Did an Abe lincoln know when he was 24 that he would be president of USA...It was not he was....its what he became that was important....see....before you find a flaw in my excellent theory....I would like to make a gracious exit....
Adios.......

The curse of mediocrity....

2009-12-23T03:38:00.000-08:00

Well I'll be blown......
I have been missing from the scene for around 2 months now.....and no frantic calls.....no fan mail urging me to go on....:P.....I think you guys must have got my email id wrong....(forgive the denial , its part of my mental makeup)...no problemo.....all is wells......Its just that I have been vigorously thinking as to what new thing I can do to make my life more better and a tad more exciting.
So what useless thing do i harp on today.....let me see.....yes the titles a definite pointer........mediocrity.........
Websters dictionary says its the state or quality of being mediocre......Do they even know how it is to be one among a crowd......Obviously webster wouldnt know....those guys being in the dictionary business....I mean how cool is that ....some aunty from your mothers side asks"what are you doing nowadays?"....and it wil be so nice to say "lexicographer"a.k.a dictionary writer.......hhowzzzat!!!....Imagine the stumped look on the aunties face when she obviously was thinking you would say s/w engineer and had lined up the awkward question of onsite oppurtunities and salaries....:P
Well enough ofwebster and his minions....lets talk bout my stint with mediocrity......around two weeks ago I got my glasses made .......and the doc really impressed me as a guy with great opthal skills.
One look at my eyes and he said I was a medical anomaly as one of my eyes had a -ve 1 and the other was a bit optimistic and had a slight positive point...:P
Apparently since both the eyes are exercised for visual pleasure ......it was weird that only one eye had taken the hit.......Imagine my excitement......the world appeared differnt now.......here I was the man with the "mononego" defect.........He suggested glassess and tried to soak me for a couple of thousands.......but fortunately I have friends in the medical field.....who got the visual aids done cheaply.....
Now this friendship comes at a cost......who was the idiot who said that the people who tell you the truth are your true friends......friends are those who lie through their teeth to you so that you dont feel bad ....well my medico friends are truly wonderful....they tracked downn a opthalmologist and actually verified that my condition was pretty normal and actually it was not the exception but the rule.......felt really nice....somebody is definitely not going to get a friendship card on friendship day .....:P...

There is only one way out of this......Do all the stupid things that you can think of ...because people think by not having fun and leading a normal life they are being logical and wise......but what the heck....we only live once and imagine your embarassment when your only grandchild asks if you had an affair and you come up with a lame comeback like "in our days things were different".......down with medioctrity and logical living......I know the pain of living a normal life...with no chicks,drugs and booze.....I mean what fun is that :P........I guess it really helps if you are the arranged marriage material ...where background checks are done on a level that even FBI would not conceive of......
the choice is yours.........would you like to have your name on a newspaper for wild partying or just pick up the paper , admonish others for having fun...and secretly wish that you missed out on them....:P
If you got rellay misguided by my weird quirky sense of logic and did attempt any stunt...please do let me know...its always a pleasure to be in contact with people whose lives I have screwed over ...:P
Cheers!!!

Its Alive!!!!!!!!

2009-10-27T17:57:00.000-07:00

Good morning fellow blood suckers :P
Firstly an apology for not providing laughter and mirth for the past week, have been busy with worrying about my exams and worrying still that Iam doing nothing but worry.....I guess we should not worry about it anymore..:P
Today I vow to steer clear of all serious topic and jolly well make fun of the most coveted desire i.e immortality......fear not we wont discuss the social evils we can correct (who wants to :P) rather we would pick it up and make fun of it until even the concept of immortality dies a mortal death :P
A few days back while perusing the daily news for news of jennifer aniston (yes people like me read the dailys only to know which bugger finally she is going out with and curse him like the dickens :P) , I came across a guy called Ray Kurzweil, I mean do the parents think before they name the kid coz they have been prophetic. Ray "of hope" has surmised that in 20 years or so we would be having tiny buggers called nanobots in our blood stream which would reverse the ageing process and provide artficial support to the system as the organs gradually wear away......Thats really good news ....lets have a look at the different sections of the society wherein Rays claim may have an impact
a) Young Lovelorn tending towards middle age chappies: My heart bleeds for this particular section of the sciety. Painfully shy these youngsters attribute their asocial ways to a specific rareness of soul :P which is not the case, everybody has the same soul and these chappies are just deluding themselves :P.....For these younglings only the big dreams do matter...if asked to haggle over the price of an overpriced tomato they would shy away like timid rabbits :P ....again they do appear to attribute the lack of street smartness to a specific rarity of the soul :P
In matters of the heart these oversized buffons normally take around 3-4 years just to talk to the object of their affection. One can imagine the painfull and agonising experience they undergo as the wooing proceeds further.....and we can safely estimate that they may dandle their kids on their knees when actually the kness are no more :P......Ray provides a way out for these people .....by providing nanobots.....with immortality around the corner these guys might as well take aeons to woo their mates without the risk of one of them succumbing to rheumatism due to old age.....one more way to look at it would be to the object of affection would never age.....this is obviously a very desirable trait.....lot of our men folks have been surprised one morning to wake up and find that this was not what they had signed in for :P.....especially when the makeup fades away bringing forth the natural beauty in all glory :P.......
b)Students : One more section of society containing all the future scientists,visionaries and obviously dictators :P.....this section evokes our pity....what with assignments and grumpy unsatisfied teachers ....they are naturally worried over the developments.....what if the nanobots make the irritating teacher immortal......when the professor humiliates the student for not completing the assignment and does so in front of the girl whom he secretly oggles at ,it fills his bosom with a vengeance which he cannot vent and what better recourse than nature to fulfill his revenge:P....he secretly prays that the teacher may suffer a debilitating lumbago or atleast the milder forms of parkinsons disease so that he may get his assignments signed from her without much ado :P .......yes the world will be a sad place for the pupil community once Ray succeeds in his nefarious plot.
c)The go-getters: this section which believes that life is not just about running fast and winning but about rubbing it in the face of the losers.......will be the most hit......IF everybody is immortal then why the heck should we compete....man even I like the idea......ambition itself has no meaning ...:P ....as it is we are all going to exist boringly for eternity......why should we poison our lives with competition.....let the go-getters win ...we would bask in the shade eating softies and chide them for being immature and not understanding the true nature of things :P
I think I have made y point (have I? :P...but it sounds cool t ask this question :P)
As I write I have a feeling that I have started to ramble....so before you guys lynch me and request google to drop my blog like a hot potato......I would like to sign off
Ciao.....

Tribute to munshiji......

2009-10-09T17:50:00.000-07:00

hullo hullo.....
A very good morning to all of you guys.....It being the weekend I know that you guys would be thinking of doing something creative and before you finalise on the nitty gritty details, Monday morning shows its smirking blue face...:P....but thats how it works....creativity is the language of the soul.....it flows of its free will and not like the ruddy municipality tap :P........Thats the voice of truth for this week ....mull over it people....:P.....
Its always nice to advice other people when one is unemployed......sort of feels like the job for the day is done :P.....
Last week was eventful..what with my resignation and all.......it was fun though....one never knows what one is expected to do after the resignation.......Do we still go to office and act as if its the best thing on earth or go ahead and have a blast and let the future take care of itself.....:P

Well enough of me though I know its a very intersting topic......lets talk about munshiji......
Munshi premchand (he is known as the shakespeare of hindi...)is one of the best writers I have read.......I never knew that hindi could be so beautiful.......There are words of expression in hindi that english cannot boast of having........And also his style.........how do I describe it......It has that distinctive indian flavour to it, sarcasm without the bitter aftertaste , a sparkling wittism and a deep understanding of the human nature.....and an endearing simplicity which makes the reader go back again and again to it , as if he had missed something in the initial read.....
Born in the time of the Raj.....his stories were mainly about the feudal system which was established by the Raj......and the way the common man strove to express his identity in a country where people are taught from infancy onwards to be patient and bear the flings of fortune without a murmur........Indian society in those days was bound by rigid conventional values and society as a whole could not compete with the capitalist monster that the british raj stood for......the indian intelligentsia was thought to be a crass crowd of village bumpkins who could not understand the opera nor swig wine and look intelligent......
Many of his stories tear apart the hypocrisy and the false hood that many indians adopted in order to be in the good books of the Raj........One of his stories describe about how an unsuccesfull but brilliant hindi writer is summoned to a gathering of writers where he finds to his dismay that all of them have assembled there not to discuss literature but to prove the superiority of foreign authors over the indian scribes.
He throws away an oppurtunity to mingle with the elite embracing penury and discloses towards the end the satisfaction he feels of being true to himself and his knowledge. In short he would rather be in the company of the great than in those of the rich. His writings mostly reflected I think the phase he was going through in his life....some of them exhort the common man to take to the way of truth emphasising that truth always triumphed and some spoke about the futility of pursuing anything steadfastedly as life was too ephemeral to be conditioned so rigiidly.... .a staunch gandhian....he left his job when he heard the clarion call of the nation and survived on a meagre pittance through his writings........none of his writings glorify people rather they speak about normal people and their reactions to overpowering social and political circumstances.
.....I really am glad that I picked up Munshijis book from the kabadiwallah than dan browns the lost symbol....though I really am a great fan of his brilliant conspiracy thories......:P
sometimes the truth is stranger and much more endearing than fiction :P

P.S for all my friends who are in general averse to any serious discussion and who are right now cursing me like the dickens.....my humble apology....:P....the next issue shall be filled with mirth and laughter till you snort .....until then .......jai hind :P

Whats my raashee???

2009-09-27T21:47:00.000-07:00

A very good morning to all the avid readers of my blog :P.....

Today I hope that again I will be able to fill your morning with light and sarcastic humour after which you may all go to work at your respective drab work place...and think how fortunate I am to do what I like :P......
My last blog evoked mixed responses.......goes on to show how the same stuff can evoke different emotions in people.....One of my friends called up to say that he really liked the way I had analysed the psychology of people and had actually done credit to my task as a scribe by inspiring spineless people into thinking......:P
Another fellow scribe instead took out his own frustration by saying that I go Nietzsche (Its an insult to be compared to Nietzsche for a wannabe comic writer....Nietzsche being the father of existential philosophy who went cuckoo after comparing languages over a lifetime....who would'nt :P)
I am someone who normally am very childish,juvenile and easily influenced by other people....especially if other people includes females with cat-eyes and auburn hair....then you would find me agreeing with her that maybe the earth is hexagonal and the sun is just an overhyped star....:P
So setting aside my own wisdom I would like to go with popular opinion and do my level best to include sex,sleaze and violence in my blog so that I may reach the cult status that Sidney sheldon enjoys nowadays.....
But my friends you would have to forgive me today...as I am someone who has led a very "vanilla" life and as such all my knowledge about the above mentioned sins is from books....give me some time to read all the sleazy books concoct them into a heady mixture , add a dash of my own melodramatism and bingo...we will have a bestseller......but for now lets keep the blog clean :P
As I write this I realize a vague promise I made in my last blog........
Yes I do remember.......I had promised to refer or discuss the making of "whats your rashee"......but since Iam much of a humanitarian I would'nt inflict such harsh punishments on my fellow mates......
Yes I confess , I succumbed to the glitz and glamour that whats your rasheee alleged to offer....but it came at a very high price....
the movie ran for 4 hours and had 12 songs in it.........what can man do against such inhuman cruelty....:P.....I understand the directors need to spread himself but this is a bit too much.......I dragged one of my friends to see it with me..and last heard he was suffering from dementia and is baying like a hound for my blood :P.....well in everybody's life must some rain fall :P......
Priyanka is her pretty self but if you see a movie for 4 hours you will nod your heads in agreement when I say "all flesh is grass" :P.....its too much for the mind to grasp....especially if the theatre is the sporting ground of the denizens of the underworld i.e (unemployed Hooligans of Mulund)..:P
I think I cant write more about it as the memory of the experience is itself daunting and threatens to take me down......for want of better topics I would now describe in detail the agony Iam undergoing nowadays as I am studying arithmetic for the upcoming CAT exam.......
It is very difficult to believe that why some college wants to know the time when sunita would reach home when she travels at the rate of 45 km/hr and takes 3 hours to reach home....I mean why obsess about the commuting habits of sunita....leave the poor child alone :P
then comes problems which are called "surds"......oh horror....my fellow mates you would'nt believe the agony.....they are so horrible that I cant even find proper keys on the keyboard to give you a example of the hideous problems ...they should have been named "absurds".....:P...
In all my years of dealing with human beings and of working in a software company never have I been admonished for not knowing that the median of a triangle is divided in the ratio 2:1.....people don't mind if the ratio is 4:1 and I think many of them don't know what a median is...:P.....
I think during the dark ages...when putting people into cauldrons of boiling oil was the order of the day......they decided that mental agony would be much more tortuos than physical agony and this must have led to the discovery of trignometry.....:P.....
All in all after a day of working out problems of arithmetic , a sensible man understands that if he sleeps with a clear conscience thinking that he has toiled hard through the day....he is befooling himself :P....
Arithmetic can help mankind in no possible way.....it is just a medium for people/teachers to show students that they are better off for knowing the absurdity of surds and without knowing the intricacies of the hexagon and its diagonals life will be a pretty messy affair to deal with :P......
If i am made the education minister I would see to it that all the creative arts are given a boost and children with unusually good arithmetic skills are admonished for showing off their brains......:P
After all calculators can do the job better than most of them :P.....but can any one of them write beautiful poetry....can they write blogs..:P......but such is the stupidity of the human race that they still don't understand my genius :P.....
well it takes all kinds to make the world......cant have too much of my type running around..:P....
that's all for today folks....see ya next week....till then slog your backsides at your corporate offices making your superior more richer than he already is...and keep convincing yourself that by maintaining excel sheets and working weekends you are going to conquer the world :P...(a bit sarcastic ,I know:P)...............

Let there be peace :P....or atleast something like it

2009-09-20T18:18:00.000-07:00

howdy !!!!!!
hello good people.....I am back with updates from my past week....It still beats me how you guys deal with life's bewildering nature in the absence of my pearly wisdom.......:P...
I think the scenario may be like this......faced with a conundrum(thats the word for the day) that fate throws upon us periodically ....we introspect,think and question ourselves....is it right????..am i bring truthful to myself???... and finally the most important of all "would this bring in more money" ????:P.....but there is nothing to worry friends.....for we can be rest aassured that our decisions wont affect the revolving orbits of mars .....even if it did there is nothing to worry...as we don't live on mars.....:P
So what do I write about today......Do I write about the socio-economic changes that has influenced the industrial age from 1920-2010 ....or do I ramble on as usual about unimportant topics which would bring peace and succour to your disturbed minds..:P
ahhh.......I can hear my readers gentle heart going aflutter......I can actually feel his apprehension.....he/she(To confirm the fact that I am no sexist) thinks "will the author succumb today to the pressures of society??"....."will he still continue the blog in a jocular vein or will he come on high brow and heavy??":P
My friends though my soul (lets call him Sidney the soul) would want to have a go at society's ills I would rather not or rather my brain(bittu the brain) would not let me do this.
You people have to understand that Iam at a tender phase when we all want to set right societys wrongs ,catch hold of people and tell them how to live life......Luckily I am at the fag end of such unholy ideologies.....
two years ago if you had invited me on a trip which would have involved mollycoddling people into living life the way it should be....I would have packed my toothbrush and pyjamas and joined you without a murmur......but now temperd with years of experience with people I have realized that its no good teling people what to do....rather one should keep ones thoughts to oneself and just laugh at people when they stumble :P
I realize that I have not yet begun today's theme and more than you its worrying me.....till the time I think up a good enough story...let me tell you about a place which i frequently visit.. ....
There is a Matth(sort of gurukul) near my house where guys ranging from 8 to 30 come to learn the holy texts.......daily agenda for these guys completely revolves around the deity which in this case is vishnu......they wake up at ungodly hours to take bath, startling nocturnal creatures having a late supper.....breakfast is a meagre affair ......as the god is waiting for his daily quota of bhakti......after the deity is given a bath and decorated grandly......they do pooja which lasts or around two hours ,I think the daily costs of flower offering itself would amount to thousands.......after this they all knuckle down and then follows a 4 course meal....the way they eat is mind boggling.......everything on the plate is mixed into a gooey paste and forced down the throat.......
During the afternoon one of the pundits gets an idea into his head to go philosophical.....he picks up any text in archaic sanskrit and interprets it......the motley crowd that surrounds him includes sleepy teens as well as doddering oldies in their eighties trying to wring sense out of obscure texts which god alone knows is useless :P....after having a nice pseudo intellectual debate they again go back to worshipping the lord......this is the evening ritual...ideally a time when all the hardworking people visit the temple to unshoulder their responsibilites on god :P...after paying the dakshina they prostrate before the deity and the pandit asking for recourse from software companies which are hell bent on sucking their bone marrow.......even a small promotion or a word of falsified praise from their seniors makes the guy thinks that god is on his side :P....

The hindu as we are referred is used to the concept of "surrender" .....the idea that the almighty takes care of all.....I truly believe in god and know that he/she exists......but I beg to differ on the point where he saves even the downtrodden.....
It would be a poor movie director who involves himself in the cast as the camera is rolling....his role is behind the curtains as the wire puller.....
The whole idea as the holy texts propagate as god being the source is true....if its not for the directors vision the movie would'nt be made in the first place.......but this director is unique....his art is for himself.....the joy of creating and allowing it to express itself on its own is a privilege which god alone enjoys......
If he interferes in the process the joy is lost.....any interference leads to loss of control ,loss of freedom....what is the fun in forcing someone to act as we force him to....would'nt it be more exciting if the subject thought for himself,acted for himself and grew to maturity by himself....an artistic creation which touches completion or perfection on its own......It takes a brilliant mind to conceive of such an idea....
Rather than save the coward from the bullying arrows of misfortune...teach him to handle the bow......he will be surprised that he is capable of things which heretofore where unaattinable...the realisation dawns that within him is a force which has an infinite potential to uplift him and take him to heights unknown......provided he desires it......
The subject realises that fear is only in the mind.....he/she is actually free..there is neither success nor sorrow...only learning.........he becomes "stithapragya".....undisturbed by emotions ...as he stands on the truth....he has known it......as far as my meagre experience of life is concerned....I have observed that true courage stems from truth....yaya...i know cliched.....but listen to the justification (if you have not fallen asleep already :P) ..........
The truth is very simple...who am I...xyz.....what i know....abc.....what i dont know.....pqr.......simple finished.......that is all there is to it....if this is you and you don't mind showing it to the world ,what is there to fear??........fear stems from the impulse to dominate,to show that I am something more than you are......when we stand on the truth...there is no other...so there is no relative subject for the fear to survive.....its after all just that.....a reflection of the state of mind.....
to be empirical.....
whats your current mood......
maybe a bit down as you didnt get the promotion you were promised......
now imagine......you are racing in a lambhorgini......on your left is a good looking femalr who has eyes only for you...and you are actually on your way to your 30 million dollar home ...
see how pleasantly pleased we are....
though both were just projections of the mind........not reality.. ....
so my friends I can see you guys are profusely sweating.....a dim suspicion floats on the boundary of your brain whether this blog is tending towards the metaphysical and unknown terra firma......fear not mates.....next blog shall be full of reviews on "whats your rashee?""..and maybe a poll on which role of priyanka chopra is the hottest ??":P.......next time I promise we will not let lose my flights of fancy and be grounded by answering basic questions like "whether harman baweja gets all the 12 Priyanka chopras in the end" :p..
till then contemplate on the purpose of your existence or be practical and wait for the release of "whats your rashee?" :P
Hari Om....

The week after :P

2009-09-11T04:29:00.000-07:00

dhante naan!!!!!!
Iam back!!!!!.....I know not a great incentive but still....:P .....Last week I realized that its work that poisons a good man's soul and makes him think that he is no better than the worm crawling along the soggy earth......
People have to realize that they are not bound by the restrictions they put on themselves....or is it just plain fear :P.
I have found that the way to tackle fear is to think about yourself in a tighter situation and imagine reaping the benefit of this plucky attitude towards life....:P
Let me prove my point empirically .......
Let's just say that we encounter a time machine along the by lanes of ghatkopar and decided to visit the times when chastity and honor were not mythical concepts :P
The machine grinds to a halt and what do we see....."aapla ghatkopar" has transformed into an arena where fighting wilder beasts was the order of the day.....and men were no better than brutes :P.
Into this picture let me introduce the glamour quotient(which makes all the difference :P),the demure one for whose side glances every brute may give an arm.....
Having set up the scene and given the atmosphere a shot in the arm...I would like to spring upon your guileless unsuspecting minds.....
ACT 1
The female feeling a bit down due to the heat removes a cottony thingy from the interior of her apparel and mops her brow with it.....a smart observer would deduce that watching two males having a go at each other was not her idea of a well spent afternoon.......also she doesn't like her escort who dragged her into this infernal place........
While executing the aforementioned action, she drops her thingummy cottony cloth into the arena.....
As you good people can see.......lady luck ,who many believe to be fickle minded female....has been working shifts here....she has conjured a precious moment in time when the dame is vulnerable and up for grabs for the next pock-marked bugger who just shows a little courage and enterprise and amuses her taxed mind.....
ACT 2:The one upon him doth the angels of fortune (i.e the pock marked bugger gets lucky)

Now we come to the crux or say to the point of the whole affair or to the clearing in the bush around which i have been beating about.
A little background on the pock-marked bugger.....(he is actually not that ugly...but we all hate a guy who is favoured by the gods especially where matters of the fairer sex are concerned).....
This guy till now had led a very sheltered life , he did not live by the axiom "god helps those who helps themselves"....he rather belonged to the school of thought which believed that if you dont mess up things they pretty much run smoothly :P..........
Imagine the irony....there were men who daily swallowed iron nails and considered the day a waste if they did not take part in a chivalrous fight which would do credit to their lives....and here we find fortune favoring won who would run at the first sight of danger......
any wayz....Any one who has been part of a hearty and boisterous group of sport enthusiasts would know that there comes during the heat of the game a point....when every person is on the edge of his seat and any sudden movements may led to the possible dislocation of the nearby enthusiast......
something on those lines did happen and we suddenly find our pock-marked hero in the arena.....looking as if the earth was pulled out from under his feet..........
He stared goggle eyed and what does he see....the beast who had made a hearty meal of the previous opponent was eyeing him with a renewed interst......
He did not like it........no sireee.....he did not like it at all.....
....he scrambled ,desperately trying to get a foothold....but in vain....for the walls had jutting rocks which cut through his fingers.....finally he spotted the white thingummy on the floor and tying it round his hand climbed the wall to the other side where definitely the grass was greener......
Now to ACT 3 :
The female who was a mute spectator to all this ........move towards him in order to initiate enquiries about his general well being...only to find him clutching the white thingumy in his hand close to his heart.......ahhhhh.....she realises that it is she ....for whom the gentleman had gone through the trying ordeal...I mean we being reasonable people can't blame her for falling in love with the pock-marked bugger.........and at this juncture we find the pock-marked bugger thanking all the obscure gods for the piece of good fortune he encounterd......
END.....
The moral being....if you encounter/face fear or at least make a good show of it......interesting things may happen to you.....and who knows even you may find a beautiful dame to hold your hands in the evening...if you are sufficiently pock-marked :P .....

over and out......

The Archer :P

2009-09-05T18:26:00.000-07:00

Aloha.....my friends.......
I know ..i know......there has been no input from my side to alleviate your mundane existence from earthy gross to subtle divine........guilty as charged :P......but what can a man do when he has so many creative sides to him....for the past 3 days , I have been dabbling with ARCHERY.......
Lesser of the goggling eyes and the finicky smile mate :P.....I know I have lambasted your opinion of me as a flippant writer of irrelevant blogs and have risen from my dead ashes to resemble a greek god well set on his purpose to save the damsel in distress.
ahhhh...you should have seen me as I stood poised with the weapon of destruction in my hand....the eyes shining with the light of purpose.....the jaw set as it should be :P.......in fact if you are a damsel of marriageable age and are on the lookout for a greek adonis.......voila......look no further.......
The weapon of destruction ...just as passing information was a dart around 10 cms in in length.....
and i was practicing on the dartboard :P........
But judge me not children....for it is not the weapon that matters but the wielder who lends credibility to it......well after a heavy round of practice of around 3 hours.....I wiped the sweat of my well muscled ,bronzed arms and set down to "work"......
Nowadays I categorize a lot of activities under the title of work......but mainly it consists of scourging the net for irrelevant topics in finance......
(By the way laid my hands on a book called "Raise your Financial IQ"......brilliant book...would recommend definitely to all the people who nurse within their bosom , the not so futile dream of making it on their own........)
Though you may deduce that my day entirely consists of sitting in front of the computer (....if you can deduce....and had been a follower of sherlock holmes in your thumb sucking days)....I would beg to differ on that part......
What I normally do after my extensively rigorous archery practice , is to go out in the big bad world and study people.....thats the best thing to do....I never tire of watching people doing silly things and wondering whether god was serious when he declared that man was his best creation.....
The other day was "ananth chaturthi".......If u contemplate the name.....I think it says a chaturthi on which happiness reigns supreme......I mean really ???..does lord ganesh think so....After 10 days of sycophantic worship by the masses....he gets the heave ho on the tenth day and people call it a day of joy.....???........ do they mean they are happy that he is leaving or are they happy that they will get to booze and party with the money that so lovingly god has bestowed on them as part of the celebrations
BEside the hype and hooplah that always surround the deity during the festivel....there was much of drunken revelry......which though I heartily wanted to join did not...as usual I stood afar enjoying their shenanigans ..and giving them the "holier than thou" look :P
The day but ended on a really sad note.......the guys at work called....they did not want me to touch literary heights and simultaneously sponge myself on the office money....sigh......they dont understand what they have done......I had an interview scheduled for saturday.....and horror of horrors I got selected :(
On the flipside ....the venue is really nice its situated on a cliff...how convenient....I guess it saves them a lot of trouble.....I mean they just have to push the guy "over the edge".......
So chappies today is my last day as a free man.....I am hoping to paint the town red tonight by drinking a gallon of sugarcane juice and getting high on the sucrose........
So from now on I would not be so much available as I gave the impression I would be :P......
May the force be with you (I was runing out of good exit lines :P)

Satisfaction :P

2009-08-31T06:47:00.001-07:00

No......Though the title sounds like the beginning of a bestseller ("How to be satisfied for no reason whatsoever")....I am not going to share my secret of a particularly contented life with you people....(or is it just me who vists this blog).......
Obviously , if i reveal the secret then nobody would get tired of browsing the net endlessly (read Wikipedia for socially handicapped poeple) and then who would read my blog and then who answers to my loss of satisfaction....:P........still I derive pleasure from the fact that I have brilliantly circumvented you guys from getting the answer and proved my point of not revealing the secret of glorious eternal happiness/satisfaction(people who have a problem with my attitude please do let me know...I would act as if your opinion mattered and laugh behind your back :P) phew :P........
In fact why should I even bother to follow the title.......as long as I have been able to draw your attention to the topic at hand.....I am perfectly satisfied...(again).......Now about my ramblings.....yesterday was as exciting as day before yesterday......had my breakfast in the morning and started planning for the evening....as it is for a guy like me everyday is a weekend(for newbies I am on bench and so having a blast) ..but not so for other mortals.....they have to toil and out of their sweat and blood comes the food that they provide to their young-lings..(pretty gory don't you think :P).....
After I finished planning as to what I would do in the evening , came the arduous task of how to spend my time till afternoon !!!!
As it is,Iam running out of ideas to entertain myself.....so I finally decided to increase my financial know-how.....there is a reason for this......I somehow have this recurring dream of sitting in NSE...and bidding for the topmost stocks........and making a pretty neat pile of money...which I finally donate to a blue-eyed kid..(dont ask me why blue eyed...its my dream not yours)...and finally when I do this , a group of amazing looking females hold back tears in their eyes at my generosity...(they have been observing me secretly)...this has finally led me to the conclusion...that I want to practice philanthrophy ...only for the sole reason that good looking females find out my secret and fall head over heels in love...with me:P:P.....
In fact I vaguely remember a tamil movie in which the hero actually loses a running race so that the fall guy gets the money to provide for his sisters marriage....whoa.....:P.....and the good looking female lead actually catches him confiding this to his(the heros) mom ....Iam really proud to be a southie and to be associated atleast by language to such great film makers.......who knows maybe it was inspired from a true story.......
Again I am digressing from the topic..financial know-how....so I registered for ***(the asterisx symbolizes that I am going to try my level best to reveal the name of the course but not directly...).follow me closely here.....:P
The course was brilliant......it had all the certifications ,on completing which a normal guy like me could boast of having been certified :P........then came the actual process for registering for a course.......I registered for Business analysis.....(q:why do courses which have such alluring names have the least interesting stuff to teach).....*****VERY BIG DIGRESSION FROM THE TOPIC COMING AHEAD ..PLEASE DONT LOOSE TRACK..IF YOU HAD BEEN KEEPING TRACK*****I mean look at Information Technology...the image one would get is of a young lad or a very good looking female(all females in my blogs will always be good looking..cos I dont write about average looking gals :P.so henceforth please append the word "very good looking" whenever you encounter the word "girl")....talking over wireless headphones...or even apparating from one place to another instead of calling up on the mobile...Can you imagine the implications :P....(I always wanted to say this).........you could directly land up in the house of the girl you have a crush on.......brilliant....any day the personal touch(no pun intended) goes a long way as far as wooing is concerned :P.....but what do we actually do ???...we copy assignments and don't even get close to understanding how modern communication works........
so basically the gist...cool name....very uncool subject matter......
still ploughed through and what......those guys had updated a big file of 369 pages !!!!!....I mean its a certification not a thesis........and I needed that certification....I was at the crossroads of either reading that whole book or else resort to the ally of many an unprepared student......the enigmatic lady luck :P........yes as you guys have guessed it..I steeled myself and decided to take the high road.......I rationalized that the certification should be completed properly in the spirit its meant to be completed....and began reading the stuff.....but slowly the language threatened to become more and more vague.......they rambled on about the duties of an analyst .....and then came paras like
"management reviews of ongoing reviews are held at key project milestones to revalidate the business case ,validate project priority based on the analysts views regarding his goals"....
That did it....:P.....
I realized that the high road is too high........and yes by the help of my beautiful ally....I finished in the top 40 percentile ...and succeeded in wrenching the certification ...which ideally belonged to someone less crafty than me :P.........
Finally.....even though there are still many things to write about....I have no time to pen them down as I have to go back to what i do best...doing nothing:P......Its been a pleasure and I hope you guys did not derive any knowledge or value addition from reading this piece...as this would defeat the entire purpose of this blog:P....its written for people who have lots off time at hand ...and have realised the ultimate truth that finally we shall find peace only in laziness and shirking responsibilities :P....
Amen to that

the sequel......

2009-08-29T17:36:00.001-07:00

Ah...a Beautiful morning.....I hope my fans would forgive my literary lapses....I couldn't update yesterday....was a bit busy...yes I know what u guys must be thinking......."What other work does this guy have...as it is he is on bench".......that's the beauty of being unemployed....you get to do all those things which one could never do, so again there is a shortage of time.....
Thats enough of justification for fictitious readers of my blog :P........Well yesterday was unique in the sense that it was like any other day :P.....Got up in the morning...did my yoga....(deepika padukone says it(yoga) clears out the toxins...and I believe her)......but a unique restlessness took over me....I thought I should improve my General Knowledge.....Even if it is of no use in competetitve exams I could use it to impress girls......:P......you know when the conversation is dying a slow death and nothing much on earth seems worth discussing about, its GK that comes to our rescue....(one of my friends impressesd a girl by talking about constellations....luckily the girl didnt know much astronomy....lucky dog :P)......so......I got down to it ....but just couldnt plough through the statistics given on the page....I mean what does it matter to me whether cheerapunji receives the heaviest rainfall in India(if you didnt know this your GK is as bad as mine and no its not a fact to be proud of)....I mean good for cheerapunji......but definitely Iam not going to wake up in the morning cheered by the fact that its raining cats and dogs in some place in India......I mean who who would believe me....people need you to have a pretty good reason for being happy......(a great topic for a post...which I think I should reserve for a rainy day when I dont have much to write about :P)......and when I delved into the idea it seemed more and more stupid....even to impress girls what am i going to say??....I can even visualize the scene....we are standing beneath the moonlit sky....Iam lost in her eyes ,she is hopefully lost in mine........and then my brain starts whirring to come up with a decent enough comment and out comes "did you know it rains very heavily in cheerapunji , around 2290 cm's!!!!"...........I can actually see the girls face wilting away as one more potential soulmate is scored off her list......yes that's life and we live in the hope that tomorrow wont be as bad as today.........
Well coming back to what else I did yesterday...hmmmm.....I think I tried learning vedic mathematics......please pay special attention to the word "tried".....vedic mathematics is a very cool thing and I though it would be an even cooler thing to add to my resume.....but sadly it isnt all that fun.....I started it expecting to master the magic of numbers within a day....It would be so cool to say within a fraction of a second what is 378965 multiplied by 6349347.....yes i agree it doesnt do much to our social standing in society ...but if you contemplate hard enough nothing else does.....:P.......
the evening was fun.....went out with friends ....as usual to crosswords , discovered a new author "stephen leacock"......known to be a writer of comedies.......I think he is a comedian......have gone through half the book and haven't encountered one humorous incident.....the best joke ever :P......
so that's it for today folks....have a nice day and if you had a lousy day please write to me so that I may read it and feel good about it "P....
Adios......

The beginning of the end :P

2009-08-28T11:13:00.001-07:00

yup......I think I should start writing a blog....at least till the time I don't leave aside the illusion that I am a part of the literati .....and hold fast to the concept of me being a hidden genius whose potential has been left untapped by the world....:P
This blog is not an attempt to earn immense popularity nor an attempt to impress girls :P..(this is what my friend who is both popular as well as is a ladies man has as his opening line ....)
Frankly its nothing....its just as the title goes the eternal ramblings of an extremely common mind....
so thats enough of self debasement ....if anybody comes across my shame on the world wide web.....atleast they will not abuse me that much when they are discussing the blog over a cuppa coffee...(He is ok....but U gotta give it to the guy...he is unassuming :P)....
SO todays hopelessly irrelevant and insignificant topic on which Iam going to ramble...is the theme of the tamil movie Anbe Sivam.....i.e Love is God...(cliched but ya we southies like it that way)
Since Iam on bench(euphemism for unemployed) ....which Iam enjoying a lot and I really do have to put on an act when people come to me and ask "did u get a project"...and Iam like (with the"frustrated software- genius -mangled-hair" look)....."no man....the buggers ...I hope they rot in hell.....very few number of projects in mumbai".....the fact that I screw up with half the technical interviews can be just added as an afterthought :P.....
whhoopsie..coming back to the movie....one of the finest of Kamal hassan....for the uninitiated....Anbe Sivam is the story of a Tamil guy with communist idealogies ,who picks up the fight with the local mill owner and predictably falls in love with his daughter....
The movie picks up pace after Kamal is handicapped and lives the life of a nomadic wanderer...doing good to all and sundry.....
Two very beautiful scenes......Both Kamal and Madhavan try in vain to save a child who is dying....but lose him out.....madhavan lets out steam by blaming god....and kamals amazingly moving repartee "I have not lost faith in God......I find him in your heart which cries for a child he does not know"....man.....Two days ago was reading a book in sanskrit (Again not meant to impress the ladies :P..though if they get impressed I would like it )........where the guy had explained "deivam Manushya roopena".......heehhe at that time felt like a bit of overstatement........and once more towards the end the way a murderer gets transformed on seeing kamal....breathtakingly beautiful....oops i guess i have jumped the horse...what happens is Mr.baddie hires goon to kill kamal....but goon already has sufferd much personal losses and repents by asking forgveness from kamal...wherein kamal says " I have not lost faith in God......I find him in the heart of a murderer who asks for forgiveness even when driven by the thirst of murder" .......Though the movie is pretty much run of the mill..Kamals acting lends finesse to his character........Well thats enough of the celluloid.......
Coming back to the remaning part of the day...I spent it productively by reading the "collected works of rabindranath tagore"......I mean where did this guy live....his language is flawless..HE writes with the innocence and simplicity of a child.......once agin the unique combination of a brilliant brain and innocent heart....One of the stories "Kabuliwala"....was brilliant...Its about a Street vendor who develops a fatherly attachment for mini....who is the daughter of one of his customers......He actually sess his own daughter in the little girl.....The story is told as seen from the eyes of Minis father......In fact there is no story at all.......he has beautifully interwoven a beautiful friendship among two individuals with the traditionality(is that a word ?) of indian culture....typical tagore .......well unlike you guys I don't do much in a day .....so that's it for today....My blessings on those who had to go through these painful paragraphs....I hope they too may find peace by writing blogs and by disturbing the peace of others :P